The Finish Line
by mysticalunicorn32
Summary: Bella Swan was on top of the world making the tops of the charts with her velvet voice then she finds out that Sam cheated on her. She runs to Seattle to hide from the world for a while. in the process running into demons from her past and new lows.
1. Chapter 1 Confusion

A/N: I dont own any of the characters. Stephanie Meyer does. I just twist them and torment them to my desire. Enjoy.

Chapter one: Confusion

All my life I ve been anxious to paint the town red, have my name in lights. I struggled but managed to get my self where i wanted to be. Funny tho, how one decision can change your perception of things. Here I am, Isabella Fucking Swan, top of all the charts with every single i put out, homes in Los Angeles, Miami, New York, London and even Spain. So why am I holed up in this tiny apartment in Seattle? Well its tiny on my standards but everyone else's its a fucking mansion. Sam Uley was my excuse for being here. A big time actor with multiple Box office hits under his belt of course the last one i co-starred with him. The lying manipulative prick. The last three years I just found out was all a lie. He had been cheating repeatedly on me with his co-stars our whole relationship. Of course i should have known when he never called me by my name just fucking misty. What am i his pet? seriously i worked hard to have people know my name. Anyways we had a huge public fight in a "Swanky" new restaurant where he admitted all the above . I just left him there with the bill and all and drove until i didnt feel like driving anymore. Thats how i ended up in Seattle.

I checked into a hotel under an alias, I know contradiction right? Wrong, Im heartbroken and in hiding so give me a fucking break. I needto get a new phone, mine mysteriously flew out the window after the fucker-who-shall-not -be named called for the 700th time. I found a phone store and picked out a hot pink number. Ha go figure.. I managed to call my manager Lance and let him know what the deal was before he called in Missing Persons or some crazy shit like that because belive me he would. I stopped at a store with window displays that looked like they fit my style and went inside.

"Yes Lance I want to sell it or something. I dont want to live there anymore... No not beccause of him...UGH whatever you want to do I dont honestly care...Yes im thinking of living here just dont spill it ok. I need somewhere I can go without getting attacked by camera flashes and the such all the time... A little is fine yes but all the time it gets old. You're the closest thing to a friend I have so please just don't spill it ok I really need a break from Hollywood..."

"Can I help you?"

"Lance I gotta go...Yes I need to buy some clothes. I mean I just moved here...I just need to buy some things ok."

"Well Im Alice. Lets see what we can do shall we."

"All I ask is nothing to frilly or girlie. I have a hard ass image I have to protect."

I swear the chick just rolled her eyes at me as she studied her fingernails.

"Well take a look around. If you wanted girlie I believe my store or my designs aren't for you."

My chin hit the floor and I stared for a minute. All that attitude in such a small woman. I deadpanned as I picked my chin up off the floor "Are you my long lost sister?"

"Funny"

"Well Alice, Im Bella." I picked up a deconstructed t-shirt off the nearest rack. "Wait I recognize this label. I refuse to wear anything other than Mad Rabbit when I perform."

"Whoa hold on there don't need to know all the kinky details."

"haha funny, Im Isabella Swan from the group Swan."

"Wait, Swan, Swan,...Oh hell now I know where I recognize that name. You're my biggest client. What happened to the whole line I just sent you a couple months ago?"

"Um in L.A. This wasnt planned you know."

"What happened?"

Amazingly I told her everything that caused me to end up here. This store was everything I loved. Mad Rabbit was a clothing line that was all rock and roll inspired pieces with lots of punk inspiration, torn denim and leather, chains and other things it was edgy but also had a soft feminine feel to it at without being over the top. As I was shopping and trying on things that Alice threw at me it hit me that she said this was her line. Awesome. When I took a closer look at her it was obvious. The pierced eye brow and other parts of her face, the tats on her arm and the spikey hair. I gues I needed to get my head out of my ass and notice people more. Maybe that's why all my relationships fail.

As I swipped my credit card my phone beeped signalling a text message.

_ B- need to work on new material soon. What do I tell Jacob and Riley?- L_

_ L- I'll let you know soon ok? _B_

"Hey Alice, Do you know where I can find an Apartment that is for rent short term? I really don't know how long I want to stay so I need to find something."

"I have an extra room."

"Where?"  
>"Uptairs. I live up on the top floor and design on the other floors. Come on ill show you."I followed her to an elevator hidden behind a mirror. Wondering who was watching the store. I was blown away.<p>

"Who designed this? Its crazy beautiful."

"Me and my mom. My brother built it."

"How much would rent be?"

"Well considering you just bought my food and whatever else I could ever need for the next year. Nothing."  
>"I have to refuse then. I couldnt not pay rent. At least let me pay for the cable and electric or something like that."<p>

"I guess you could then. We can work it out."

"Are you always this trusting? I mean I could be a psycho or something?"  
>"But you're not so there. Plus I can use you as a personal manniquin."<p>

"WHAT? No way."

"Do you want one of a kinds and original pieces or not? My brain has been in overdrive since you walked thru that door and even more so since I found out you were my biggest client. I always wanted to but was chicken shit I guess. So now since we are friends then I gues im going to forge on."

I guess I could use a few female friends. I think I could trust Alice. She's not like all the barbies from L.A. "Shit I forgot that I just booked a hotel room for the week. I guess I could go check out."

"Don't do that yet. Go ahead and stay for now. Let me and mom re-work the room and then surprise you in a week ok?"

"Um, ok, Ill just take a weeks worth of clothes for now then. I gotta go get some of the essentials first tho and hair dye. Hot pink hair dont make for blending in too easily."

"Go here, she's great. She does my hair." Alice handed me a card for Angela's Hair Oasis. Before I could even respond she was on the phone scheduling me an appointment. I followed her back down to the main floor and watched as a tall skinny blonde man walked out from behind the counter. Where the hell did he come from? He walked over and kissed Alice on the forehead.

"Jasper meet my new friend and roommate Bella. Bella meet my fiance Jasper." All I can say is these two are exact polar opposites.

"Nice to meet you Bella, No worries ok we wont let anyone find you here."

"How the hell do you know that? Why would you say that?" I stammered out. Incredible what was with this guy?

"Chill OK? You obviously need a break from your life. Smile,Honey, its ok."

Long story short, I followed Alice to Angelas and back to my hotel where packages were waiting for me of clothes to last a while and all my essentials. We agreed to meet later in the week for dinner. My signature Hot pink locks were now back to the natural Chocolate color I was born with. I felt better but was still as jaded as hell. I curled into the bed and passed out. Hoping that the nightmares stayed away.


	2. Chapter 2 TROUBLE

A/N: I dont own anything related to Twilight the Esteemed Stephanie Meyer does. I just twist the characters to my own liking.

Chapter 2 T-R-O-U-B-L-E

"Hey Bella."

"Hey Alice, Sorry I'm late. Got tied up with a phone call."

"No Worries. This is my brother Emmett, he's a cop, This is his beautiful wife Rosalie, She built my building. You have already met My Jasper, He owns and bartends the towns hottest bar "Smooth". This other butt wipe is my other brother Edward. He is a family doc here in town."

I threw up my hand and waved at everyone "Nice to meet all of you"

"Guys this is Bella Swan."

"The Bella Swan of SWAN?"

"Yes Douche. Don't mind him Bella, I think our mom dropped him one too many times."

"It's cool. It will be nice to know a cop in this town. In case things get crazy."

Dinner was an easy flow of conversation between us all. By the time I left I felt like I had known them all forever. What I hadn't counted on was enjoying myself so much. So this is what it felt like. Friends will finally be nice.

Alice told me my room would be ready by Sunday, It was Thursday. I couldn't wait. I couldn't play my guitar in my hotel room. Found that out the hard way. Damn hotel guest. Throwing my name around didnt impress the manager either. I walked into the room and fell across the bed kicking my boots off in the process. I flipped on the tv and fell asleep again praying that the nightmares would stay away another night.

_"Marlyn what did you think of that band? Weren't they awesome?"_

_ "Oh my God, Bells the drummer was fucking HOTT. I would give my right arm to hang with them."_

_ "You can hang with us ladies instead."_

_ "Sorry but we dont know you pricks so just go away ok?"_

_ No, but you will know us real well by the time we are done."_

_ "Fuck Ben, these girls are so fine. Here ladies try one of Ben's original Cocktail the lady killer."_

_ "Marlyn I think we should leave."_

_ "You two bitches arent going anywhere." Slap_

I jumped up screaming in the bed. I got up and stumbled to the bathroom to wash my face, shaking the whole way. I guess I couldnt get lucky enough to keep the dreams away too long. I went to the liquor cabinet and grabbed the bottle of Vodka that was in the front and drank straight from the bottle. I drank til I passed out cold in a dreamless slumber.

-Sunday-

"Hey Alice, whats up?"

"Well numbnuts its Sunday and you do remember whats happening on Sunday dont you or have you no brain cells at all?"

"Well If you only knew. But yeah I remember."

"Well fruitcake get your ass checked out and over here now."

"Alright, see ya funky ass in a minute."

"Meet me out front of the store ok?"

"Yeah, whatever."

The massive hangover I was suffering from drinking none stop for the last 3 days didnt help my brain and body any. I gathered my things and made sure I didnt break anything. I settled my bill with the manager and shit $3000.00 on liquor was outrageous but I had no contacts here. And I was trying to stay clean. Just as I got in my car my cell rang again. Thinking it was Alice...

"Im on my fucking way nag. Give me time."

"Bella?"

"Shit Lance sorry, whats up?"

"Have you seen the new issue of Gossip weekly?"

"No why"

"Go purchase it immediately. Like NOW!"

"Shit ok Lance. Ill call you back. Tell James I said hi. How is the loverboy anyways?"

"He's good. Says hi and sends his love."

"Bye"

I stopped at the bookstore close to Mad Rabbit and picked it up not paying much attention to it yet and a caramel frappe. I needed to knock this hangover quick. When I got out of my car at Mad Rabbit I grabbed my cell, the magazine and my coffee and of course my sunglasses stayed on my face. No need to alert the media to my alcohol induced stupor. We went into a descret side door that bypassed the shop and went sraight to the apartment on the top floor via elevator just inside the door.

"Bella this is my mom Esme."

"Nice to meet you." The woman looked nice enough but then she pulled me into a crushing hug.

"Nice to meet you sweetheart. I hope you like it."

I think I'm going to puke she was so sweet, but seemed nice enough. Alice opened the door to what was going to be my room and I was blown away. The whole décor was done in a tough punk like design with Hot pink and black and not barbie pink and black. It was divided into a large sleeping area, a sitting area and a huge ass walk in closed that was sound proofed so that I could play my guitar and not disturb anyone. Found out real quick it was just the closet that was sound proofed.

"I love it. It's perfect. Thanks." I mumbled. I really did like it. I got my things settled and went to dinner with Alice and her mom. If they noticed my large consumption of alcohol they never said a thing. I managed to walk straight all the way home and into my room. Lance would be so proud, I never slurred a single word or stumbled once. I went to stretch out on my bed when my phone rang again.

"Bella where the hell are you? I miss you. Lets fix this please?"

"Fuck off Sam" I slammed my phone shut and finally noticed the magazine that Lance insist I purchase. The cheap fucks never told the truth. It wasn't really worth my time but Lance seemed to think something in it was worthy of Isabella Swan's attention. The middle spread made me choke on my breath.

"FUCKING JAKE I'LL KILL HIM!" I screamed.

Alice came running into my room"Are you alright?"

"Yeah, just need to call my manager."

"Lance"

"Well Hello to you too Bella."

"Did you see the article?"  
>"Yes, who took those shots and please tell me you aren't doing what it looks like you are?"<p>

"Doesnt matter just get Jake up here ASAP I'll book him a room at the Hilton for one night."

"Why?"

"Doesn't matter just do it."

"Are you ok Bella?"

I sighed "The nightmares are back Lance."

"Oh."

"Yeah, Good night Lance and James."

-Tuesday-

Tuesday rolled around and I'm sitting at the restaurant waiting for Jake to come in nervously fidgeting with my fingers. This wasnt going to be pretty. I glanced up ad in walks Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie, Edward and a tall Blonde. Fuck . And behind them is Jake. Tall dark and handsome. He makes me sick. Great they didnt see me. Hopefully they wouldn't hear what was about to happen..

"Bella."

"Jake" He kissed my cheek. Making me throw up in my mouth a little.

"Why Seattle? This is a little tame for you Bells."

"I ran out of gas but enjoying it."

"So what did you need me up here for? Need me to make you feel good, maybe a little loving?" The fucker actually winked at me. I should kill him. I just stared at him as I threw the magazine on the table. "how could you Jake?"

He leaned in closer to me and in a dark and menacing tone "I told you I would if you didn't do what I asked you. So you brought it on yourself. Should've came back to me."

"I wouldn't fuck you again if my life depended on it you miserable fuck of a person. You're fired."

The whole restaurant was staring and quiet now seeing as how our voices had reached nuclear levels. I stormed out and found the closest liquor store I could find. I purchased all the liquor I could carry plus some.

"Having a party miss?"

"No." I growled as I grabbed my purchased and made it back to my room. This was going to be a long week for sure.


	3. Chapter 3 Darkness

A/N I dont own Twilight. Stephanie Meyer does.

Chapter 4 Darkness

I have no idea what time it was but I sat on my bed waiting for the darkness to come. I wanted to sleep but was so scared. I had just fired Jake in front of everyone in Seattle I think. The Alcohol wasn't helping anymore. My phone buzzed...

_**B-What the hell did you do? Why did you fire Jake? L**_

_** L- Help me. He did a bad thing. It could ruin me. He's not the only one to blame tho. _B**_

_** B where are you? L**_

_** L 1547 West 4**__**th**__** street. I moved in With Alice. The creator of Mad Bunny clothing. B**_

_** B I'll be there as soon as I can get things settled here. Are you ok? L**_

_** L yes im fine. See you soon. B**_

I covered my head and tried to sleep begging the dreams to stay away.

_"Tyler you get the fiesty one. Ill take Marlyn."_

_ "Ha I would love nothing more that to fuck this little princess."_

_ "Stay away from us. Come on Marlyn we are leaving."_

_ "I told you once before...you aren't going anywhere." Slap." how do you like that bitch?"_

_ "Fuck this slut is tighter than anyone ive ever fucked before."_

_ Maryln started to scream then silence. "Marlyn..."_

_ "shut your mouth or you'll meet her fate."_

_ "What did you do to her?"_

_ "Ben just knocked her out. Right Ben? Ben?"  
>"I thought I did. I must have hit her harder than I thought. She's not breathing dude.<em>

_ Let's get the fuck out of here." _

_ "What about feisty cunt here?" Tyler swung and all I seen was black._

I was shaken awake by what felt like an earthquake. I jumped up.

"Damn Bella you scared the shit out of me. Are you ok? You were having a nightmare."

"Yeah, Im fine Alice.I just need to wash my face." I stumbled to my bathroom tripping over empty bottlesof Jack Daniels and various other Jacks Jims and Captains. "Fuck did I really drink all that?"

"I would say so unless someone came home with you I didn't know about."

"What time is it?"

"3 am why?"  
>"ugh, I dont know just curious."<p>

"Well aren't you the cheery drunk."

"Was that sarcasm? If so I love you."

"Sorry I don't like pink tacos."

"Did you seriously just say that?"

"Haha yeah, sorry. You should have went to dinner with us. There was some chick yelling at this guy during dinner. Fired him for something after saying she would never fuck him again."

Im sure my face went sheet white."Glad I missed that then. I need no more drama in my life.."

-Saturday-

"Im here to see Bella. Tell her its Lance."

"BELLA you have company. Says his name is Lance."

"Hey Lance. What brings you here?"

"You fired Jake remember."

"That was you at dinner the other night. What did he do to you?"

"Let's take this in my room ok Lance. Aren't you and everyone else going out tonight?"

"Yeah, why don't you guys join us? You need some fun time Bella, all you do is sit in your room and brood."

"Yeah, Bella, you need to get out and forget about Jake and Sam."

"Alright but will James be ok with you going?"

"Yeah he'll get over it."

"Well let's head over to Smooth, Jasper is giving us the VIP room tonight. Its just me, you, Edward, Emmett and Rose."

"Edward's blonde won't be there?"

"Who, Tanya? Nah, she's too important to hang with us more than once a week. Skank."

"lol that's what I was thinking. Anyways what ever. Let me dress."

"Wear the plaid school girl skirt, torn fishnets and the safety pin shirt. With the boots. Ill come fix your hair and make up."

An hour later and several hot pink clip in extentions later. I was walking into smooth and blown away. It felt be out without dealing with drama like Jake Black and Sam or even the nightmares. I hoped they caught the fuckers soon. It had been almost 6 years and still out there. I danced with Alice then with Rose then with Emmett. Edward just stayed at the table and watched. Broody Prick. But I liked him none the less. Just wish I could get into his head. Lance chatted him up for a bit before he came out and danced with me and Alice.

"Im going to go get a drink and hit the bathroom ill be back shortly."

"K, I'm going to continue to dance with ms. Lance."

"Hahaha ok."

I made my way to the bar and told Jasper I wanted two frozen margaritas and went to the bathroom,. On my way back a huge paw like hand grabbed me and as I spun to punch the Fuckers lights out I realized it was Sam.

"What the Fuck are you doing here?"

" I came to make things right with us."

"I told you I wanted nothing to do with you. I want you to leave me alone."

"I won't leave you alone until you promise to take me back."

What was it with me and screaming. I am sure the whole bar could hear me. "I want you to get your shit out of my house and leave me the fuck alone. OK? IF not I will file a restraining order against you."

"How? I haven't harmed you or made you fear for your life. You won't be able to get one."

"Just please leave me alone. I'm done with you." I ran out of the bar before anyone could stop me. I only had cash on me hidden in my boots and had left my cell at Alice's on the bar. I just ran and ran until I ended up in a seedy part of town.

"Hey baby, looking for something?"  
>"Yeah, a fix. Know where I can find some?"<p>

"Are you a cop?"

"Do I look like a fucking cop to you?"

"hmmmm No not really. Come here. What are you looking for?"

"Anything. Coke preferably."

"I gotcha right here. Even got fruit flavored."

"No need to get fancy just need something to make me forget the past."

"How much you got?"

I took off my boot and handed him a roll. It was about 2 grand. "This is all I got on me. Is this enough?"

"Thats plenty."

"Don't try to rip me off dude. I know my shit. Just new in town and have no connections."

"I would never try to rip someone off that's as pretty as you."  
>"Fuck off and just give me my shit." he handed me the stuff along with what I needed to shoot up. The fucker was a class me unopened syringes. Cool. I found a secluded spot and shot a small does up and hid the rest in the toe of my boot. I wondered around and ended up at the docks. IT started to pour and I just sat and stared at the ocean.<p>

"Alice have you seen Bella? She came to the bar and ordered two frozen margaritas and never picked them up."

"She was just here Jazz. Lance have you seen Bella?"

"No but he may have. That's Sam he's her ex. I wonder what he's doing here. Sam, what are you doing here?"

"I came to talk to Bella and she got pissed and ran out."

"Fuck, where could she have gone Alice?"

"Home maybe?"

"Lets go. Maybe she will be there when we get there."

"Why do you not sound so sure?"  
>"I don't know, Fuck its raining cats and dogs."<p>

"She's not here. Her purse is here. Try her cell. Forget that her cell is here on the bar."

"Calm down sis, she'll be fine I promise."

"Thats my cell...Hello? Bella? Where are you? Does anyone of you know where the docks are?"

"Yeah, I'll go get her."

"Bella, Edward and Emmett are on their way to get you. Emmett she prefers you stay here. I don't know why ok. Bella Edward is on his way. Are you calling from a payphone? Don't move from that spot ok? Bye."

Edward arrived as I finally felt the coldness of the rain. "Bella are you ok?"

"Just cold and wet. And no idea how I got here from the club."Im soaked thru and thru."

"Let's get you home."

"I don't want to stay with Alice tonight. Can you just take me to a hotel or something Please?"

"You can stay with me for now. I'll call and tell them I'm taking you to my place so I can make sure you dont get hypothermia."

Edward gave me a tour of his house. I fell in love with his music room and went straight to it after I dried off and put on some of his plaid pajama pants and a long sleeve t-shirt. He threw my other clothes in the dryer and called Alice to let her know I was safe.

"Alice is bringing you some fresh clothes tomorrow. Ill show you to your room."

"I can't sleep. Is it alright if I stay in here for a bit? Im in love with your piano."

"Sure. Im down the hall if you need me."

"Thanks. A lot." I made sure my boots were next to me. Didn't want anyone finding my stash. I sat on the piano bench and started to play. I don't know how long I played but I managed to start yawning. I walked down to my room with boots in hand and stuck them under the bed. I curled up in the bed and passed out.

"Bella, Bella wake up your having a night mare. " I could hear him but couldn't open my eyes. I was under so bad. I awoke next morning feeling really warm. I tried to roll over and was trapped by two strong arms. Fuck what did I get myself into last night? Oh thats right I went on a bender and stayed with Edward. The doorbell rang and Edward jerked up."That must be Alice. Hey are you feeling better? You were screaming in your sleep and only way to get you to stop was to hold you."

I blushed about three shades of red I think. "Sorry, They happen a lot."  
>"What were they about?"<p>

"Another time. I don't like talking about you dont get that door She's going to have a melt down on your door step."

"You're right." I changed into my clothes and Alice hugged me and told me she was glad I was ok. She and Jasper were going away for a couple weeks on vacation. I told her I would be fine on my own but seriously I wasn't going to be.

"You can stay here if you want. That way you won't be alone. No pressure just a thought."

"Sure that would be great. I'll grab some clothes later and thanks again Edward."Fuck what am I dragging him into? Do I really want to get him involved with my life?


	4. Chapter 4 Light

A/N: I don't own anything having to do with Twilight. I do own a raging headache and a bag of Lemons. First off let me apologize if anything in this chapter is wrong I have never been in the situation I have put Bella in nor do I really know anyone that has. I did research on the internet about duration of the effects And Bella started out a hard ass in this story and in some ways she is still but she is starting to soften up to Edward but only a bit. She doesn't really trust him yet but trusts him more than anyone else in her life but Lance. OK enough rambling time to start the show. Please review and let me know how im doing. I live for it and can only get better if you point out the flaws of the story. =)

Chapter 4 Light

I locked myself in Edward's music room so I could finish off what I had hidden in my boots when they found me. It took me a couple days but I wrote a new song in the process. I started to feel it after almost 48 hours straight. I know everyone was worried but I just couldn't let my dreams catch up to me. Edward knocked several times a day on the door asking if everything was fine. I would just strum the guitar louder or the piano. I would sneak out to the kitchen when I knew he was asleep if I was hungry which wasn't often. I was now out of the coke that I relied heavily on and was starving. I snuck into the kitchen when I heard Edward on the phone.

"I'm worried Alice, she's been in there nearly two days with no food, no drink and no said it's normal for her when she gets into a writing phase. But she ignores the door when I knock...I will... Love you too sis. Bye."

I hurried back to the room but tripped over my feet in the process falling on my ass. "SHIT"

"I was beginning to think you died in there."

"Nah, just working the kinks out of a song.."

"Um, you stink." He repiled as he crinkled his nose.

"Thanks Mr. Tact."

"Come on go shower and I'll make you something to eat. You must be starving."

"Yeah, I actually kinda am."

I ran upstairs to the guest bathroom and it hit me did I get rid of the evidence of my addictions? I think I did. I flew down the stairs and into the music room to find Edward sitting at the piano.

"What's wrong?'

"The words are so sad, Bella, but beautiful."

"Thanks." I said while I glanced around the room making sure everything was gone. Luckily it was.

"Forget something?"

"Yeah, my phone."

"Here ya go."

"Thanks" I ran back up and grabbed my clothes out of the guest room and into the bathroom. Damn that shower felt awesome. And I realized how hungry I was when I heard my stomach growl. I stumbled down the stairs after dressing in yoga pants and a camisole. Comfort was my best friend today. My stomach growled again as I rounded the corner and smelt the wonderful fragrances coming from the kitchen.

"Damn, something smells good. What did you make?"  
>"Chicken fajitas."<p>

I grabbed the ingredients to make frozen margaritas and made up a pitcher for us to go along with the meal.

"God, Edward, these are heavenly" I moaned, "Heaven." I finished my fajitas, I just couldn't get enough of them. I even made another pitcher of margaritas. "I just noticed Edward you havent touched your drink? Not like it?"

"It's good just gotta work tomorrow so I don't want to have a hang over."

"Oh," I stifled a yawn."well thanks for dinner I'm going to crash. See you in the morning."

"Um Bella it's only seven pm."

"I've been up for a couple days working on that song, I just had to get it out before it killed me"I mumbled not wanting to tell him the whole truth. "Goodnight"

"Goodnight Bella."

I awoke at 5 am the next mornig in a strange bed, warm, wrapped in strong strange arms. I jumped up off the bed before I realized I was in Edward's house but this wasn't my room. I was in his bed in his arms. "What the Fuck?" I startled awake. He rubbed his eyes as he spoke."You had a nightmare again. I couldn't wake you and you wouldn't calm down any other way. I held you quieted down but when I got up to come back to bed you started crying again. So I picked you up and brought you to my bed. You slept fine after that."

"What did I say?"

"You didn't. Just kicking and screaming."

"Sorry" I mumbled as I sat back down on the bed running my hands thru my hair. Looks like alcohol doesn't work at all anymore. I was afraid of that. "I'm going to go back to my bed now."

-2 days later-

"Glad you could meet me. I need something stronger than snow."

:"Well I got LSD and I have some E. The effects last longer but the LSD won't guarantee a good trip every time."

"I'll take my chances. I'll take both. All you got please. I need something to help me forget."

-several days later-

I must be in the fucking twilight zone because again I wake up in Edward's bed and arms. I can tell I've been crying because my eyes feel like they have been sewn shut with sand in them. Edward looked at me with concern in his eyes.

"You cried and cried Bella. What's up with these nightmares?"

"I can't and won't talk about them right now. You have to believe me. I just need to get through this."

"Well then tell me why I found this by your bed at two am when I rushed in to find you screaming and couldn't comfort you? I mean come on Bella, LSD and E? Do you have a death wish?"

My eyes went wide with shock. FUCK FUCK FUCK...

"Well...!" His tone was soft and defeated.

"I...fuck you aren't my mom or dad you know." I yelled. I felt like a teenager on trial.

"No but I am your friend and I care about you."

"I don't need this."

"No you don't, you need help. Let me help you. You're killing yourself. Don't think I haven't noticed you may have eaten three or maybe four times in a week and a half. What's going on Bella?" He was beside me now. I couldn't breathe but the word vomit spilled out.

"I started drinking a couple years ago to stop the nightmares. I met Jake when he auditioned for the band. He was the best damn guitar player we heard and we seen at least a thousand or more. He was shady but good no he was a great player. We hit it off and started dating. I kept having the dreams so he introduced me to cocaine. It helped but I didn't like myself on it so I stopped seeing him and tried to stay off of it but occasionally I would snort a line or shoot up. I then met Sam and our relationship wasnt the best. I just couldn't quit. I t got to be where I needed it more and more because the nightmares just wouldn't stop. It was the only thing that made them stay away. When we broke up I just started driving. I ended up here in Seattle. I stayed clean because I didn't know where to get it here. So I stayed drunk mostly. Then, Jake sold those pics of me shooting and snorting so I ran and then when Sam showed up here it just pushed me over the edge. When you found me I was so high I didn't know my own name. I was so incoherent. I locked myself in your music room to finish off what I had hidden so no one would notice. It took me two days to finish it off but I did it. Then, I had to find something else to take the edge off and for longer hence the LSD and E. I need help but even help won't keep the nightmares away." I rambled it out before I could stop myself. I knew I needed help I knew it a long time ago. Edward just stared at me for a moment before he let his eyes drop to the floor tugging on his hair in the process.

"What's causing the dreams Bella?"

I looked down at my hands twisting in my lap" I can't tell you right now. Maybe one day but not today ok? I just made a major confession. Can we leave it at that for now?"

"You'll eventually have to tell me or someone."

"I know."

"Get dressed. I'm going to make some phone calls."

"Edward."

"Bella..."

"Do you hate me?" Tears fell down my face...What the Fuck? I'm crying because I'm scared he'll hate me? I'm nothing to him or anyone else. Why should I care if he hates me or not?

"No, Bella I don't hate fact if you want it I'm going to help you get help. Do you want help?"

I stood there as he hugged me. I felt hope for once and my hard ass exterior started to crumble. One of my walls started to crack. "Well?" I just shook my head in agreement afraid of what would come out if I spoke. "Then go change out of your pjs and meet me in the kitchen."

-Monday-

I sat in the passenger seat of his car biting on my fingers and lip. "I can't believe this shit. I agree for help and you put me in an inpatient rehab? I wont be able to do anything."

"I've worked it out so you can have your cell and call anytime you want but only numbers your allowed to have are mine, Alice and Jaspers, and Rose and Emmetts. Oh and Lances. No one elses. Oh and you will have your own private room."

"Fuck that's not many but then again I have no real friends." We drove the rest of the way in silence.

"I'm Edward Cullen and I'm here to check in Bella Cullen." My head whipped around so fast I think I almost broke my neck. The clerk stepped away to get the paperwork. "I did it so no one would know. That way press doesn't get wind of it and ruin your career.e whispered to me.

"OH"

"Just fill these out I'll need to have your bags and purse. After everything else we will have to search your person to make sure you're not sneaking anything in."

"Here's my suitcase. I don't carry a purse."

"Ok then just fill the forms out and please give me your phone. I need to erase all the numbers except what was given to me on the list provided. You did block internet on it right?"

'I had them block it when I bought it I have my laptop for that."

"Not in here you don't"

"I didn't bring it. It's back at home." I wanted to smack that smug ass bitch.

-Later that night-

I couldn't sleep terrified of wahts coming. I pulled out my cell and dialed Alice no answer. I tried Jasper no answer. I then tried Rose no answer and then Emmett no answer. Shit someone has to finally answer their phones. I tried Edward's then and luck would have it he answered.

"Hey aer you sleeping?"  
>'"No was reading why?"<br>"I can't sleep."

"Why?"

"I'm scared..." Yeap tides were definitely changing. "read to me?"


	5. Chapter 5 Road to Recovery

A/N: I don't own Twilight or the characters. Just twist them to my darkest desires.

Chapter 5 Road to Recovery

I hate this place I hate this place I hate this place. I've been told can't have this can't have that. UGH. Have to hide my phone til lights out. We have to do chores and if we don't complete them we don't get visitors. WTF I'm not a kid. This week its kitchen duty for me next week I get to mow the lawn. There's like 4 acres.

"Lance get me the hell out of here."

"Bella you have to complete your treatment. Are you wanting to beat your addictions?"

"Yes." I sighed.

"Can you do that on your own?"

"No, I think we already established that Lance."

"So then you need to stay.'

"Lance, I can't have my phone, I have to do chores if I don't do them I can't have visitors. I can't do anything." I grumbled. Wait I'm sounding like a spoiled brat. Am I really that bad?

"You're just cranky, Bella, having withdrawals.I would say having them has to be hard, but I really don't know. You'll be fine. I'm sure of it."

I could feel my blood pressure rise, "Lance I'm going to go. You're not helping my attitude any."

"Good night Bella. James sends his love."

"Night." When I hung up I was still edgy and hateful. I need to calm my nerves somehow so I called Edward.

"Hello. Bella? Is that you?"

I instantly felt calmer. "Yeah"

"Are you ok?"

"Just cranky Edward. How's everything going?"

"We are all coming out to see you on Wednesday."  
>"That's great. I can't wait" I said sarcastically. "The people here suck."<p>

"That's not nice Bella. You're just edgy from the withdrawals."

"Humph, Lance said the same thing and I hung up on him. Well not really but anyways. What are you doing?"

"Reading."

"Romeo and Juliet still?"

"Yeah. Want me to read to you?"

"Yes please." I fell asleep listening to his voice. I just couldn't tell him how much hearing his voice calmed and helped me. It was strange almost like I depended on him.

-Wednesday-

UGH I'll never get this grass cut. 4 acres 80 billion tress. I won't get to see my friends. Wow real friends that felt good to have friends. I never could keep friends in LA they always wanted part of me. These guys seemed real. They haven't asked for anything yet. I finally finished the yardwork (About damn time too) sunburnt but finally done. I flew in and up the stairs to the showers and cleaned up. I made it to the cafeteria in record time. I spotted them as I walked thru the door. I ran and jumped up and wrapped my arms and legs around Edward giving him a huge Bella Bear hug.

"Silly Bella, It's only been a couple weeks."

I laughed as Jasper clamped a hand over Alice's mouth. We sat and joked and laughed until I noticed the serious look cross Lance's face.

"Bella we need to address the pictures that sent you here. What do you want to do about them? I think we need to hold a press conference."  
>"When I'm out of here we can. Final word thats it. We are having to do counselling here. I'm working on my past. I don't want anyone to know I live here in Seattle. I don't want anyone to know anything right now."<p>

"Bella we are your friends you have to let us in sometime."

"I know Edward, I'm working on it now in my therapy sessions. I have to be able to face it before I can stop reaching for the shit that forced me to end up here. I need to deal with that before I can talk to anyone else about it."

"Bella I would like to think we are a family. Am I right guys?"

"Alice has a good point Bella.' Lance whispered. "Ive known you forever and these guys are the closest thing I have seen you have that resembles any family. They are closer to you than I am."

"You all are part of my own little twisted family. You are all I have. If it weren't for you guys I'd be in a ditch somewhere. Thank you for everything." I said with tears in my eyes. Damn these people and their uncanny ability to make me cfeel things.

-8 months later-

I was still staying with Edward in his house, the doctors from the center thought it would be best. I just finished my shower and pulled on the comfy plaid pajama pants and long sleeve t shirt Edward gave me the first night I stayed with him. I hurried down the stairs to get a cup of coffee. I could hear everyone in the den talking. I also heard a voice I couldn't recognize.

"Hey guys, what brings you all here?"

"Who the hell is this Edward?" Blonde chick screams

"This is Bella, Tanya."

"What the hell is she doing in your clothes? Are you fucking her? Is that why you're dumping me?"

"Whoa hold on bitch, what the hell is your problem? Edward and everyone is friends of mine. You need to back off. But honestly if this is your attitude no wonder Edward is dumping you." I was so mad, I was shaking. How dare the blonde witch talk to me Isabella Swan that way. Who does she think she is? "You know what I'm going to my room. I really don't need anymore drama than I already have in my life. I'll talk to everyone in the morning." I left the room but could still hear them all.

"You date my brother for 2 years and you have never hung out with us. In fact everytime we planned something you backed out. Now out of the blue you want to hang out with us. Somethings fishy Cunt and I intend to figure it out." Alice yelled fuming. Obviously Edward's family hated this chick. I don't think Edward really cared for her either.

"Edward are you going to let your sister talk to me that way?" Tanya whined

"Actually, Tanya, I am. It's over. You have wasted mine and your time. So I think it would be best if you got your things and left. IF you call me or come by here ever again I will have you arrested." Edward calmly stated. He was eeriely calm. I then heard a clear smack. I decided I needed to move from the doorway. I went on up to bed.

I continued to go to group therapy daily and drove around a lot. I started to smoke cigarettes, secretly of course, until Edward caught me in the park one morning. So I quit. Then I decided I needed something to occupy my time so I got a job (like I needed one but hey). I worked as a receptionist for Mike Newton. I arranged for all my wages to be donated to the local battered womens shelter.

Mike was a pediatrician. I enjoyed working for him and hanging out with all the kids. Molly was one of his nurses. She was a sweet lady in her 50s. She kept telling me I was looking so thin. Then cookies and cakes and various other foods started appearing on my desk daily.

"Hello, Dr. Newtons office. What can I do for you today?"

"I need to speak with my brother Mike."

"Can I tell him who is calling?"  
>"Stupid Cunt its his brother Tyler."<br>As I was thinking the voice sounded familiar, I felt chills go down my spine. I would recognize that voice anywhere.

A/N: (I know two in one chapter but anyways) Thank you all for the wonderful reviews. I feel the love so much. If you see anything that is conflicting or just wrong about any of my story please please let me know. Have a twi-tastic day.


	6. Chapter 6 Running Away

A/N: I don't own any thing related to twilight. Enjoy.

Chapter 6 Running Away

I slammed the door to Alice's apartment. "Alice, would you like to go to LA with me for a week or so?"

"UH, Why?"

"I got something I have to take care of and I think we need a vacation."

"Press Conference?"

"Yeah, just not looking forward to it."

"OK, I'll go only if everyone else can come along as well."

"I'm not going to kill you if thats what you think." I laughed.

"Not worried about that. I think we all need a vacation."

"Sure, that's fine."

"I'll work out all the details." I grabbed her by the shoulders and spun her to face me.

"Girl, I have a house, we can all drive down in one of my Hummers and stay in my house."

"OK then what do you need me for?'

"I need you and everyone else for support. I'm terrified."

"Of what exactly?"

"Everything." WTF I just admitted to another Cullen I was scared. I need to nip this feeling in the bud. I can't be blabbing my emotions to just anyone.

-Couple days later-

Everyone was able to come to LA. I think it was some random miracle. We had just arrived at my house.

"Ana, Rob these are my friends Alice and her husband Jasper, Emmett and his wife Rosalie, and Edward. Guys this is Ana and her husband Rob. They are my housekeepers and what ever else I need done."

"You are really selling this place?" Alice yelled.

"Yeah, too many memories but not to many good ones."

"Hey Bella."  
>"Yeah, Edward?"<p>

"Where's my room? I need to make a few phone calls."

"Remember Bro this is a vacation." Emmett teased Edward as he punched him on the shoulder.

"I know." replied Edward cooly. "When is your Press Conference?"

"Friday. Its Saturday now so we have all week."

"Ok, any good radio stations around here?" Edward questioned.

"I'm partial to 102.7 KIIS. Listen to it all the time when im here. Let me show you guys where your rooms are."

-Later that night-

"Ana did Sam get all of his things? I really don't want to have to deal with him while I am here."

"He came a couple days ago with a truck and a blonde barbie had moved everything to the garage. He stood and watched him load it up. Well everything he wanted anyways. Rob wanted to make sure he didn't take anything he wasn't supposed to."

"Good I'm glad he's gone."

"Me too dear, He was no good for you. I'm glad you finally seen that. Glad to see you with real friends and sober. Have the nightmares stopped child?"

I shook my head. "No not entirely. But not as often as before until a couple days ago. Now they are back in full force Thanks to a phone call I got that wasn't even for me."

"Who was it?"

"I would rather not talk about it."

"When you're ready dear. I wish you wouldn't sell the place. It's like home here. Where are you going to move to? You've spent most of your time here until recently? If you don't mind me asking."

"Would you and Rob be willing to move to Seattle?"

"Dear we would do anything for you. If not for you Rob would be six foot are like the child we never had. You are family to us."

Ana brought tears to my eyes. I loved them like family. They were the closest thing I had to one since mom and dad died. It was my mom and dad who pushed me to follow my dreams, piano and guitar lessons along with voice lessons from age five to sixteen. Even put me into dance lessons. Everything I wanted I got. I guess that's why I feel like such a prima donna.

"Well, Ana, you are like my family too. I need to get to bed now. Got a busy week ahead of me. Thank you for the hot chocolate." I hugged her and started out of the room "Oh, Ana, you could tell I was doing drugs?"

"Yes dear, it was quite obvious when you know some one as well as I know you. Should I make a big breakfast dear?"

"Yes, make all your specialties. The guys will think they have died and gone to heaven." I smiled at her. Ana turned her back to me to wipe the counter off.

"The gentleman with the piercing green eyes seems stuck on you."

"Um no he's just a great friend. He has helped me more than anything. Why do you say that?"

"I think he sees more in you than you see in your self pet. Dont be surprised when he asks you."

:"Asks me what?"

"Nothing dear. Get some rest."

I stared at her for a minute waiting and silently urging her to go further into detail but she never did.

-Friday Morning-

Alice had fixed my hair by dying it Hot pink and putting black highlights in it. She had dressed me in black shredded skinny jeans, knee high boots with a billion buckles and a bright pink blouse that hung off one of my shoulders showing off my vampire angel tattoo, mismatched earrings consisting of one skull and the other a guitar both hung to my shoulders. She made my make up of dark smokey eyes that were over done and pale lipstick. I was seriously dark. I loved it.

"Where's Edward? I thought we were going to the press conference together." I was starting to get anxious and nervous. I was yelling. I was clearly frustrated but no one seemed to notice.

"He said he had something to do." Muttered Emmett.

"OTHER THINGS TO DO? LIKE WHAT? UGH!" I pulled at my hair getting madder by the second." Never mind let's go." I was hurt. He knew why I wanted him to go. I wouldn't be able to get thru it without him. I cringe at the thought I have become dependant on anyone but he has some strange calming effect on me. I'll deal with that in next weeks session with the shrink.

Lance had tried to get me to take a limo but I really wanted to drive so I wouldn't think too much about things. I jumped into my yellow Hummer and watched Emmett's mouth hit the ground.

"Pick you chin up and wipe the drool off Dipshit."

"Can I drive? Rose I have fallen in love with this machine. I love it please Bells let me drive."

"Maybe later. Right now we are going to be late if we don't get a move on." I turned on the radio and started our drive to the Hilton.

_"This is Banging Jack and this is the banging show on KIIS. Today we have a special guest for you. This young man is here to sing a song and ask a special lady a special question. Everyone please welcome Dr. C."_

My eyes bugged out of my head. WTF.

_"I would like to jump right in if you don't mind before stage fright takes over and I freeze."_

I could tell he was nervous. I looked at Alice. "Did you know about this?" She just shook her head. Emmett and Rose mimicked through the rear view mirror.

_"Go ahead Dr. C."_

_ "Swan, I've fell head over heels for you. I've watched you grow and change in so many ways in the past year and a half that I have known you. This is for you."_

He started into his own version of 'Here by me' By 3 Doors Down. When he came to the end I had a heart attack.

_"Swan, would you be my girlfriend?"_

_ "Ok, would the one and only Swan call in. Our number is 555-2346. Hello caller are you Swan?"_

_ "No but if his Swan doesn't call. I'll be his swan anytime. He sounds seriously sexy."_

_ "Well, we will keep that in mind."_

I turned the voulme down slightly and turned to Alice who was handing me my phone, she had already dialed the number. I hit send and waited for my turn on the air.

_"Your on the air. Is this Swan?"_

"Yes, This is Swan."

_"Your voice sounds familiar. Dr. C is this the one and only Swan?"_

_ "Yes it is."_

"I've called in a lot in the past."

_"So what is your answer Swan?"_

"Do you really want me as part of your life? Even with the crazyness that is my life?"

_"Yes"_

"Ok I'll be your girlfriend, by the way your sister just busted my ear drums."

_"That was his sister screaming?"_

"Haha yes. Dj could you play something by Black Swan?" He of course agreed and I hung up as he went on to discuss the press conference coming up not realizing I was Bella Swan of Black Swan. We pulled into the Hilton's parking garage and I hate to say it I was still grinning ear to ear.

"You guys really didn't know about that?" No one did I realized until I ran into Lance who was grinning ear to ear.. "You knew about that didn't you?"

"What? Me? I will never tell." He laughed."Are you ready for this Love?"

"As ready as I'll ever be. Let's get this over with."

"Ladies and Gentlemen I called this press conference because I knew you would all have questions over the photos that showed up this time last year. I was, as you can tell by those photos, addicted to several hard core drugs but have since then checked into and completed rehab. I have been clean and sober for about 8 months now. I regret my decisions and ask that you forgive m. I also ask that you continue to honor my request for privacy. I still have some recovery to do. Now if there are any questions, I would be honored to answer them."

"_What happened between you and Same Uley? Rumor is you cheated on him with your former quitarist Jacob Black."_

"I wasn't the one that cheated and there hasn't been a relationship between Jacob Black and I since we first started Black Swan. Any more questions?" 

I flew through the questions and sank to the couch in the back room when all was said and done. I was exhausted and relieved that it was over at the same time. I grabbed the keys out of my pocket "Hey Emmett, Want to drive home?" I asked as I slung the keys to him.

"Can I? Can I?" Emmett was literally bouncing up and down in his seat like a kid in a candy store.

"Sure I'm drained."

"You were great Babe."

I turned "Edward you're here."

"Yup, I am. I've been here the whole time. I promised you I would be. Just had to take care of something." He winked at Lance.

"That was Cheesy." Jasper laughed.

"It was sweet actually, Dr. C." I hugged him as I laughed at Jasper. Ana was right. I would have to give her a raise.

We drove back to the house and played video games way into the early morning. We slept late on Saturday and drove back to Seattle on Sunday. I could feel the tension hit me as we got closer to to home. What would happen if they realized it was me that answered Mike's phone? I really didn't want to know. I came out of my thoughts as Edward's lips brushed my ear making me shiver.

"What's wrong? You're so tense." He whispered in my ear.

"Nothing." I whispered back "Nothing at all."


	7. Chapter 7 Coming Clean

A/N: I dont own anything twilight related. Excuse the grammar errors, and mistakes. Working on getting everything betaed. I have the first 4 chapters done just need to replace them. Thanks Marie. So with that being said give me your best shot. I can handle it. I would love to know what you think.

WARNING this chapter discusses rape and murder. If you are sensitive to this please skip this chapter. But then again you'll miss the whole reason behind Bella's madness. OK read on.

Chapter 7 Coming Clean.

The last couple weeks were great with Edward. I went back to work for Mike without any other calls that upset me. I finally told Edward I was working for Mike when he shocked me and said he and Mike had been friends for years. The nightmares still came but not as bad. After everyone Edward would ask me about them but I promised each time I would tell him later.

"Good morning Mike. How was your weekend?"

"Morning Bella. It was interesting but not in a good sort of way."

"I'm sorry. I wish I could help."

'It's ok. If I get visitors could you come get me right away? By the way love your pink and black hair."

Crap I forgot to dye it back. "Ok I will. I'll dye the hair back soon. I promise."

"No it's ok really it is."

I had a sense of dread but pushed it back. Right before lunch the bell over the soor dinged and two harsh voices filled the lobby. I cringed because I would recognize them anywhere. SHIT.

"Hey Dollface is Mike here?"

"Um yes," I stuttered "Can I tell him who's here?" I said before I looked up. When I did I masked the horror on my face. Ben and Tyler.

"His brothers." Ben spit in my face.

I took a deep breath and prayed they didn't recognize me. I knocked on Mike's office door. "Hey Mike, your brothers are here." I seen his face go white.

"Ok Thanks Bella. Send them back."

"OK, I'm taking the rest of the day off. Is that ok?"

"What's wrong? Sure just tell Molly." He rambled.

"Just feeling nauseous. I will thanks." I hurried out and showed the two monsters back to his office, grabbed my purse and left Molly a note and fled.

"Damn Bro thats some nice piece of ass you got working for you. Is she any good?" Ben Sneered.

"Do what?" Mike Gasped.

"The Bitch with the pink hair? Is she good in the sack? Come on Bro tell me you have hit that ass?" Tyler laughed.

"Um no actually I haven't."

"Tyler, you forget he's the goody goody in the family." Ben joked.

Tyler laughed. "I did forget. Anyways bro why we are here. We need a place to hide our for a while. Can we crash at your place?"

"For a night or two. Jessica is coming over and I don't want you guys to scare her off.. I'm going to ask her to move in with me."

"Dude it's monday. We will be gone, long gone by then." Ben laughed.

I drove as fast as I safely could to Alice's. Luckily she wasn't home. I called Lance nearly hyperventilating.

"Lance they are here in Seattle."

"Bella,? Honey, is that you? Calm down and breathe. Who's there in Seattle?"

:"Damn it Lance. Tyler and Ben. The guys that raped me in college. They came into Mike's office today. I just hope they don't recognize me." I managed to spit out.

"Calm down and relax. I'll call Eric and see what he says for you to do."

"Who the hell is Eric?"

"He's the detective with the FBI. Remember?"

"I don't remember much right now Lance."

"Anyways relax. I won't let anything happen to you but I think it's time you tell Edward and everyone else what happened so they aren't left out in the dark."

"You're right. Just in case." I hung up and sent a text to everyone asking them to meet me at Edwards. I then sent one to Rose asking her to find me some land so that she could design and build a house for me on it. Emmett could design the security system.

-That Night-

"So what's going on Bella?" Jasper asked with a mouthful of chicken alfredo. I could tell he could sense my nervousness.

"I think its time I told you about my nightmares and what is causing them." I took a deep breath and stood up and started to collect the dinner dishes.

"Leave them. I can do them later." Edward insisted.

We all moved to the living room. I sat on the couch and fidgeted with the hem of my shirt. " I understand if you don't want me after this Edward." I stated quietly.

"Why would I not want you?" He asked as he took my hand. His touch both comforted me and scared me, because I didn't know how he was going to take what I was going to tell him.

"Well, we are waiting." Alice fussed. God she was so bitchy most of the time.

"Give me a minute. OK? I haven't discussed this with anyone in a long time. Lance was the last one and that was when I first hired him."

"Ok." Edward replied as he started to rub my back sensing my discomfort. "Lay off her back Alice. This is big for her."

I took another deep breath and jumped in with both feet. " I didn't think this would be so hard. OK, when I was in college me and my friend Marilyn had attended a concert at a on campus coffee shop because she was digging the drummer. We were on our way back to our dorm room when these two guys, who were standing in the shadows, tried to get us to go with them to their place, which we refused because they seemed so creepy. Some how we ended up in their dorm room. I still don't know how we ended up there. It was all a little hazy. They served us a drink they called lady killer even tho we refused. They literally forced us to drink it. When we tried to leave they forced us to stay. Things started to get all blurry again and I couldn't fight back or anything. We were terrified. Next thing I know we are being forced to have sex in various postions. I hear Ben say to Tyler, they thought we were both out cold and started using their names again, man this one is tighter than anything I have ever fucked before. Marilyn started to scream. He hit her across the head with something and she was quiet. I screamed for her and was told to be quiet or I would meet her fate. He thought he had just knocked her out but suddenly she jerked a little and started gagging. Ben grabbed her by the throat and started choking her. When she stopped breathing all toghether they hit me over the head with something leaving me there thinking I was dead.. I decided when I heard them panic to play dead. I called 911 when I figured they were gone. They have yet to be caught but when they are I can never forget their voices and faces. I first recognized their voices over the phone at work right before we went to Los Angeles. That's why I was in such a hurry to get out of town. Then today when I got to work I noticed Mike was acting strange and then they came in at lunch asking to see him. It was then that the voices and faces matched up in my head. I was afraid that the drug they put in my drink had clouded my memories and I wouldn't recognize them bit I did. I remained calm and sent them to Mike hoping they wouldn't recognize me. I left as soon as they were out of my sight and called Lance. He advised me to tell you guys incase something happened. " I finished but didn't dare look up at them scared of what was going through their minds and what showed on their faces.

"Damn Bella, I'm so sorry." Came from Rose. I glanced up andcould see the anger reflected in both Emmett and Edward's faces.

"Mike never mentioned a Tyler or a Ben. In fact he never mentioned having brothers." Edward growled.

"I didn't know they were related until they called the office. If I did I would never had put my self in that situation. And Mike isn't like them. I get the feeling he is terrified of them." I said in Mike's defense.

"They won't get away with this Bella." Emmett Sweared "I will protect you. I promise."

"Thanks Emmett but the Feds are involved. They will handle this."

"So this is what drove you to do all that you did? The Drugs? The Alcohol?'" Alice asked.

"Yes." I answered quietly.

"I can see why." Jasper whispered. "I would want to forget too."

"I'm sorry Edward if I'm too broken for you to love." I whispered with tears flowing down my face. This was the most emotionally draining conversation I have ever had.

"Hey, this was never your fault. I love you for who you are here." He poked my chest where my heart lay underneath."Not because of your past. You are my swan. I love you no matter what." He assured me as he pulled me into his arms.

"You are a part of our family now Bella, we will be here for you t hroug it all. No matter what." Alice said matter of factly as she joined me and Edward on the couch. She hugged me and Edward.

"Thanks guys that means a lot to me."


	8. Chapter 8 Who Am I?

**A/N: I don't own anything Twilght. Stephanie Meyer does. I just twist the characters to meet my desires. Please review and tell me how im doing and if you're enjoying my story or if you hate it. Or just to say hi. Lol. Have great day. Bella's about to get a huge shock.**

**Chapter 8 Who am I?**

-A month later-  
>I was jogging when my phone started ringing. I didn't recognize the number so I sent it to voice mail. Well I'll be damn if it didn't keep ringing. I guess I had better answer this.<p>

_"Hello?"_

_"Isabella Marie Swan?"_

_"Um Yeah? And you are?"_

_"Detective Garrett James."_

_"And what do you want from me Detective James?"_

_"I been hired to find you."  
><em>  
><em>"By who?"<em> I ask as my pulse quickens at the thoughts of who would be looking for me.

_"Your parents."_

_"Im sorry I think you have the wrong person my parents died a long time ago."_

_"Are you sure about that?"_

_"Yes."_

_ "Where they your biological parents?"_

_"Phil and Maggie are I mean were my parents."_

_"Would you be willing to meet with my clients? They are very Anxious to meet you."_

_"UM I don't know."_

_"We can do it somewhere you feel safe. They have been looking for you for 27 years."_

_"Can I call you back in a little bit. I Really need to think this over."_

_"Sure 555-2166"_

_"Ok I will call you back I promise. I Just really need to absorb what you told me."_

_ "I understand. We are looking forward to your call."  
><em>  
>I finished up my jog and went back to Edwards to shower. Esme and Carlisle had invited everyone over to dinner. Rose also wanted to show me something. A surprise she said.<p>

-That night-

We arrived at dinner and i was impressed. Esme was so charming and likable. Carlisle was HOT but hate to break it to him Edward is hotter.

"Your quiet tonight Bells," Emmett stated, "Cat got your tongue?"

"No just got a phone got a phone call today. It kinda has the gears in my head turning."

"So that's the smoke we've been smelling." Jasper attempted to joke.

"Haha funny, no it ws a detective claiming my biological parents were looking for me and they want to meet me."

"I didn't know you were adopted." Alice whispered

"Funny thing is I didn't either Alice."

"Can't hurt to meet with them then Bella and see what's up, " Carlisle replied, "You can even have them come here to our house so we can all be with you."

"I guess you are right. What can it hurt? I ll call detective James right now. Thank you so much." I called Detective James and gave him the address andt old him tomorrow at 3pm would be best for me. He assured me they would be there.

"Hey Edward, Can you bring several DNA tests home so we can be for sure."

"Sure Love anything you want." Edward answered.

"Ok Bella time for your surprise. Put on this blindfold." Rose said with excitement.

"A blindfold What the Fuck Rose?"

"Don't worry. Trust me everything will be ok I Promise." Rose sighed.

She walked me out the door and outside but not to the car like i thought she would. We walked for about ten minutes before we stopped. She removed the blindfold and i was looking at the shell of a house. a massive house at that.

"Here's where your house is going to be. Theres the walls, and thats the pool. and over there is the horse stables ." Rose rushed out. I could tell she was excited.

"Isn't this your family's property?"

"Yes but you are part of the family now too bella." Esme whispered to me.

"Thank you Rose for all of this."

-Next Day-

"Bella honey please sit down you are going to wear a hole in mom's carpet."

"Fuck Edward I can't." I moaned just as the doorbell rang. I glanced at the clock 2:59 great early.

Carlisle answered the door. "Hello, I'm Carlisle. Welcome to our home. You must be Detective James and you two are?"

"Mr?" Detective James asked.

"Oh forgive me. Cullen."

"Mr. Cullen this is Renee and Charles Swan."

"Very pleased to meet you both." He stated as he shook their hands."Right this way. Everyone this is Renee and Charles Swan. This is my wife Esme, My sons Emmett and Edward and my daughter Alice. Emmett's wife Rosalie and her brother Jasper who is married to Alice and this is Bella."

I remember hearing those names before and seeing their picture in Phil's office when i was small. I shook their hands as Alice whispered in my ear. "You look Just like them Bella."

"Was I adopted?" I blurted out.

"No, honey. Is that what they told you?" Renee asked with tears in her eyes.

"No." I hissed. I wasn't liking this one bit.

"Who had you?" Charles asked.

"Phil and Maggie Dwyer. They said they gave me my name because it was an old family name." Great i wasn't making any sense. Fuck this was worse than a train wreck.

Renee gasped and Charles pulled her to him. " I Never thought he would go that far." She cried.

"Excuse me but what are you talking about?" I was getting impatient and Edward noticed. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

"When we were first married my wife was left alone a lot. She got bored and started an affair with a professional ball player named Phil Dwyer. When we decided to work on our relationship she broke it off with him. we never really heard from him again. We got pregnant with you and you were born on our second wedding anniversary. There was a mix up at the hospital and several babies were swapped. By the time they got it straightened out you were the only one unaccounted for." Charles exclaimed.

"Bella do you have a picture of your parents?" Detective James asked.

I showed them a picture i kept in a locket i wore as a ring on my finger.

"Oh my god. Charlie I recognize her. She worked for my obstetrician."

I stood and started pacing again. "Will you two take a DNA test? I mean Phil and Maggie were never mean to me. They gave me everything I wanted. Dancing lessons various lessons for musical instruments and voice lessons. They even sent me to College. So please don't think bad of them." I cried out.

"But Isabella, they kidnapped you." Detective James brought up.

"They didn't raise me like they kidnapped me. They were very good to me." I yelled again."Forgive me I have been under a lot of stress lately that was no way to act."

"It's ok dear." Renee sobbed.

Edward swabbed both of their cheeks as well as mine and sealed them up to take to the lab on monday. They said their goodbyes and I told them I would call them when the results came back.

"Damn Bella, you were the spitting image of That Charlie dude. Only prettier." Emmett sprouted off. Rose just whacked him on the back of the head.

-Wednesday-  
>"Well Bella the results are in."<p>

"What does it say Edward?"

"That you are 100% related to them."

"What the fuck? My whole life is a lie. What am I going to do?"

"What you have always been doing. What ever you want." Edward said as he hugged me.


	9. Chapter 9 Is This The End?

A/N: I don't own twilight. I just play with it.

Chapter 9 Is this the End?

My life has been flipped upside down and turned inside out. What was I going to do? I wish I could snap my fingers and everything go back to the way it was and Phil and Maggie were still the only parents I had and Ben and Tyler were not a threat. I wish life could go back to normal. But who was I kidding my life was anything but normal. So that was why I begged Lance to go to lunch with me.

"Well Bella,I got some news for you on your parents."

"They're dead? Really Lance I already knew that. In a car. I was there."

"Your biological parents duh. Has all that dye went to your brain?"

"Do I really want to know?" I groaned. He was grinning at me the way a cat that swallowed the canary. "UGH ok spill, so we can enjoy our lunch. That is why I invited you to meet me remember?"

"Charlie is the star of the newest CSI spinoff. He has been a steady actor most of his life. Renee is a child abuse advocator and writer."

"Your point is what exactly?"

"Well Love if you are worried about them wanting your money. They don't need it."

"That thought has never crossed my mind. Its almost thanksgiving and I need to get my shit together. Do I continue as Im going and just hang out with you and the Cullens for the holidays or do I do the family thing with a family I don't know?"

"Well my advice is don't change anything but get to know them. That's all you can do. I'm not saying drop everything and start calling them mommy and daddy and stuff like that just get to know them."

-Monday-

"Hey Mike I'm going to take a break. Is that ok? Molly is covering the phones." 

"Sure Bella, thats ok."

I stepped out the back door and lit a cigerette. I haven't smoked since Edward caught me fresh out of rehab but finding out your life was a lie does strange shit to you. Just as I took a long drag I felt someone grab me from behind and cover my mouth. I was dragged to a large van with dark windows. The door opened and I tried to kick and scream even more. Ben was leering at me from inside the van. This was not good.

"Quit struggling bitch. I don't want to kill you yet." 

My eyes went wide with fear and I just shut down. I knew this was the end. No one knew where I was.

-1 hour later-

"Hey Molly, have you seen Bella?"

"No Mike I was just going to ask you if you seen her. She stepped out back about an hour ago."

"Did she take her things with her?"

"No her purse and phone are still here. Want me to look out back?"

"I just did. She's not there. I'll call her friends."

"Hey Edward, It's Mike. Have you talked to Bella since this morning?"

"No why?" 

"I can't find her. She was here a while ago, then went for a break and we havent seen her since. That was an hour ago."

"Maybe she went home for the day? Did you check The house or Alice's place?"

"Her purse and phone are still here on her desk...Edward are you still there?"

"Yeah, I'll see you in a few minutes. I'm calling Emmett and he will meet us there."

**(A/N:from here on out in this chapter it will be all Edward's point of view**)

-That night-

"My God, I can't believe she's gone. Could it be Ben and Tyler?" Alice choked out through the tears.

"More than likely, Detective O'brian is checking with Jacob and Sam to get their alibis but we both think it was Ben and Tyler." Emmett answered.

I think we were all in shock. Emmett was holding it together but only because he was in cop mode now. This couldn't be happening. I would find her, I had to.

-One month later-

"Hey Edward, It's Emmett. We had a tip that they were hiding in an abandoned warehouse on the west side of town. We have searched most of them but not found her yet but we are still looking." 

"Will we ever find her Emmett?" 

"Yes, we will, Little brother, I promise.I won't rest until we do." Emmett promised. 

I drove out to the west side of town, I hadn't intended to but I just ended up here. There was a homeless shelter I used to volunteer at all the time down here. I parked in one of the safer lots and started walking towards the shelter. I passed one of the empty warehouses and heard a muffled scream.I stopped and waited. I heard it again. I recognized that scream anywhere. I heard it every night. I found a window and glanced inside. There she was chained naked to a bed. One of the men was punching her and shoving something between her legs. I really couldn't get a good look at what it was. I stepped away from the window and called Emmett.

"Found her." Was all I said and proceeded to give him the address of the warehouse. He asked me to meet him at the empty lot next to the homeless shelter. He arrived 20 minutes later with the swat team and the FBIs team they sent out.

"I'm going to get her out of there Emmett, If she's scared I can help her."

"No, I won't allow it." Emmett yelled.

"I think Edward mabye our best chance of getting her out alive." Detective O'brain butted in.

"Only if he wears a bulletproof vest." Emmett countered.

"Ok, Give me one." I demanded. Emmett wasnt happy as he strapped one on under my jacket. I zipped up the hooded jacket so it wouldn't be so obvious. I slipped in the door and hollared. "HELLO is anyone here? I heard screaming."

"EDWARD?" I heard her scream.

I rounded the corner and there they were.

'"What the hellare you doing in here? This is private property." Tyler said as he raised his gun and aimed it.

"I came to investigate the screaming I heard." 

"You're a cop" Ben Yelled. As Tyler pulled the trigger..

All I heard after that was an explosion and then there was darkness.

"EDWARD NOOOO!" Bella screamed.


	10. Chapter 10 Waiting

A/N: I so don't own anything Twilight related except some neat stickers with Edward's face on them. I just like to twist the characters to my own twisted desires. I also got tired of mike being the bad guy. Here he is a good guy. Ben and T yler are the evil ones. Anyways enjoy this chapter jumps quite abit of time almost 2 years. It was necessary to set up the rest of the story. Will they have a HEA ? Doesn't look like it at this point. But never know. I know there isn't any lemons yet but wait for it.

Chapter 10 Waiting

"Edward NOOOOOO!" I screamed as the bullets ripped through the air and found their mark.

"Now to finish what we left off Bitch." Ben growled. "The ken doll is dead so there's no one to help you now."

Tyler hit me upside my head wit the pistol he just fired and I blacked out. But I swear I heard someone yell police as I did.

Emmetts POV

"Police Freeze!" I yelled. Then I noticed Edward laying motionless on the floor. "Oh God Edward.!" I ran to him as Detective James and his crew rushed in. I forgot all about Bella.

"You two are under arrest for Rape, murder and money laundering. Surrender peacefully or we will use force." Detective James ordered.

I found a pulse on Edward but it was faint. The bullets penetrated the vest I had insisted on him wearing. There was a commotion behind me and before I coujld look it settled.

"We won't be taken alive." Tyler yelled waving his gun around frantically. Then three shots were fired. I jumped up with my gun drawn. Detective James and another Detective had fired rounds into one of each of their legs. One of the men had hit the other detective in the arm. Detective James handcuffed the two men and Edward and Bella was transported to the hospital.

-2 days later-

BPOV

I could hear voices over me but couldn't open my eyes.

"As soon as the doctor gives her the all clear we are moving her to an undisclosed location until those guys are in prizon for life. We will keep her a secret. She wont be able to contact anwone until we say so."

"But Detective James, she has ta job and a contract to keep. We are her family. She needs our support." Lance argued with the detective.

"You can see her after the trial." Detective James insisted." We will discuss this later."

I was in a panic. I heard the doore open and waited but heard no one else. After a while I could finally open my eyes. I was alone and sore. The door opened again and the nurse walked in.

"Well, hello, let me get the doctor." She said in shock.

"Wait, can you get me a notepad and pen please? I need to leave a note for my friends." I think I practically begged the poor woman.

"Sure."

She returned with Dr. Jane Hanson. "Wow you're finally awake. Let's give you a good look over." 

"Doctor do you know if Edward is ok?" I asked

"I'm sorry but I don't think he is here."

That could only mean one thing. Edward didn't make it. I wrote out a letter for Alice.

_Dear Alice,_

_Please forgive me for everything. I don't know how long I'll be here for. The feds are taking me to a hiding place. I heard them talking about it. They won't let me have contact with anyone til after the trial. Please believe me when I say I'm sorry for everything. I'll come find you as soon as I can. Tell Edward I love him. They wont tell me how he is. Or where he is. Thank you_

_ Forever your sister_

_ Bella_

I folded it up and when the nurse returned I asked her for an envelope. When she returned with one I sealed the letter inside and wrote alice's name on the front. I asked the nurse to give it to Alice for me.

That morning I was in an unmarked ambulance being taken to a small airport. I got on a plane with four guards and flew for what seemed like forever before we landed in a small redneck town I didn't even know exsisted.

-3 months later-

They flew Lance in blindfolded so we could work. I could watch TV but had no internet or phone. They had changed the phone number on my phone and deleted all of my contacts. Great. That was the only place I had Edward and everyone's numbers. I couldn't get ahold of anyone and they couldn't get ahold of me.

The trial started and I gave my testimony in a plain white room over a closed captioned video camera. They didn't want me in the same room as Ben and T yler. I never knew who all was there to testify against them.

-10 months later-

The trial was over and the monsters were found guiltyof all charges. They were given life sentences without chance of parole. Apparently Marlyn wasnt the only woman they killed. Then I thought about Edward. Detective James wouldn't talk about him but he did tell me that in about 3 months they would move me back to my home.

-13 months later-

I was free finally free. I felt like the one in prison. Thank God I was finally my own person again. I went to my home in LA. I had Ana and Rob get in touch with Rosalie while I was in solitary and get the keys and things for my house in Seattle. I didn't know if I was going to move in or not but I wanted it ready incase I did.

I started having nightmares again. This time it was Edward getting shot. I started using again.

"Bella, I have good news. Well you have been booked for New Years in Times Square and your new guitar player Travis will be here tonight to meet you. " Lance informed me as he came through the door.

Apparently the other guys just didn't want to wait around even though he was getting paid.

-19 months later-

New Years was a blast but I was high the whole time. I could have sworn I seen Edward and Alice but he was dead right? I found a look alike for him an actor that was the spitting image of Edward to film my new video the remake of "According to you" I also found a Sam look alike.

I decided to move back to Seattle. LA just didnt' hold me any more. I offered the house there to Ana and Rob but they wanted to move with me. So here I am in Seattle a little more than a year and a half later.

"Let's get coffee Bella. Im dying." Lance begged.

"Ok, here's a starbucks." I said and Lance practically drug me inside. I ordered a extra large caramel frappe and Lance got a large black coffee. We sat and drank our coffee and discussed work.

"Bella?"

I looked up and it was Emmett and it wasn't happiness that I saw on his face.

"What the hell are you doing here? Haven't you done enough? Edward's suffered enough because of you."

"Edward's alive?" I asked

"Yeah,no thanks to you. You are one deceitful conniving bitch you know that?"

I felt the tears flowing and jumped up and ran out the door bumping into someone as I did. I didn't bother to look up I just mumbled my apology and ran.

"Hey Lance. It's been awhile. How are you?" Edward asked Lance as he walked up to the table.

"Edward, man you look good."

"Thanks its good to see you again. Sorry I'm late Em, some chick just about plowed me down at the door."

"Um, Edward that was..." Lance started but Emmett butted in.

"That's fine man let's get a table."

"Oh hey, Lance, How's Bella?" Edward asked


	11. Chapter 11 Who?

A/N: I don't own Twilight or any of the characters. This is just my twisted version of their lives. I hope you enjoy. This story is nearing completion soon. A few more chapters I think. We will see tho. Anyways back to it.

Chapter 11 WHO?

I ran out of the coffee shop without looking back. I expected them to blame me for everything I just never expected the words to come out of Emmett's mouth, Rose's maybe, but never Emmett's. I stopped and looked up and realized I had ended up in front of Mad Rabbit. I took a deep breath and stepped inside.

"Welcome to Mad Rabbit, if we don't have what you're looking for, then you're in the wrong store." Alice said without looking up.

I walked up to her nervously. "Um Alice..."

She looked up and her eyes grew wide. "Bella? Oh my God what the hell are you doing here?" She Screamed as she hugged me."Wait why are you crying?"

"I ran into Emmett in Starbucks."

"Fuck him. He's had his boxers up his ass since you disappeared from the hospital. Where did you go by the way? Why didn't you call of give us your new number?"

"You didn't get the letter I left you at the hospital?" I asked letting the shock show on my face.

"Um you left a letter?"

No wonder he was mad. "Yeah, The Feds took me to a secret location, changed my number and deleted all my contacts. I was secluded for the last two years. They wouldn't let me talk to anyone involved in the case. I hardly got to talk to Lance, he was flown in blindfolded so he wouldn't know where I was. It was crazy."

"Lance could have gave you our numbers."

"He wasn't allowed to bring his phone into the room when we worked. When he tried to call you, no one returned his calls or messages.I had him try and find out about Edward so I could pay for his bills."

"So you're the one that sent the red and white roses. There was never a card just flowers ever so often."

"Yeah," I was tugging at the end of my pony tails, "I came to town to apologize to everyone whose life I fucked up with this. So... I'm like sorry Alice."

"Wait, you don't have to be sorry. How long have you been in town?"

"I just got in this morning."

"Well where are you staying?" Alice asked with her hands on her hips.

"Not sure yet. Don't know if I can go to the house that Rose built for me or not. Don't know if I'm ready for that or not."

"Stay here in your room. I never changed it. Then when you decide to move then you can. There's actually been someone there for a couple months now."

"That's Ana and Rob. They are getting it ready for me, just in case."

'Oh."

"There's so many people I need to apologize to. Jasper, Mike, your parents, Rose, Emmett, and Edward most of all. I had thought he died. Until today."

"Well, Jasper is at the club but he will be here later."

"OK, I'll stop in. Bye Alice." I hugged her and left to see Mike.

-(Dr. Mike's office)-

"Hi, I need to see Dr. Newton please."

"Do you have an appointment?"

"Um..No but it's important."

"He can see you next week." 

"What's your name?" 

"Angela. Why?" 

"Angela, Would you please go tell Mike that Bella Swan would like to see him." 

"Ok. I will but don't count on him seeing you."

"Bella?" I heard behind me. I turned and came face to face with edward. I almost crumpled there on the spot.

"Edward?"

"How are you doing?" He asked.

"I'm ok. How are you?"

"Better, just finished up my therapy. I'm finally done."

"Therapy?"

"Yeah, for my arm. Why are you here at Mike's? Are you a friend or Patient?"

"Yeah, Don't you remember? I used to work here."

"Oh, yeah, after Rehab." 

"Yeah."

"Ms. Swan. He will be out in a minute. Edward, you're early. Lunch isn't for another few minutes."

"I wanted to see you and couldn't stay away. I missed you."He said. My chin hit the ground as he kissed her lightly on the cheek. "Bella, this is Angela Weber, my girlfriend."

"Um...Hi."

"How do you know Edward?" She asked.

"I...Ugh...He was...I mean he's an old friend of mine."

"Oh, would you like to join us for lunch? You two can catch up."She innocently asked.

"NO!. I'm sorry I can't." I mumbled.

"Bella!" I turned and there was Mike."Come to my office. Cullen. Have her back on time today won't you."

I followed him to his office. I apologized numerous times and he like Alice swore I owed no apologies. We caught up on the last two years. Jessica agreed to marry him. He was estatic.I said my goodbyes and agreed not to be a stranger and left. I met Alice at her place for dinner around five.

"Alice, does Edward remember me?" I asked out of the blue.

"Yes, He just doesn't remember anything after you got out of rehab."

"That explains a lot then."

"Huh?"

"I ran into Edward at Mike's office."

"And met Angela. Am I right?"

"Yeah."

"I'm so sorry. I should have told you. He proposed to her but I don't think he loves her like he did you. I mean does you. If he would remember LA I think he would realize Angela isn't for him. Would you get the doorbell?" she asked as the doorbell rang.

I went to the door and it was Edward.

"Hey Bella, I didn't know you were here."

"Yeah, is Angela with you?"

"No why?"

"Nothing."

"Dinner smells great sis." He said as he walked past me.

We ate and talked about everyday things. I was miserable. There he was across from me and I couldn't touch him the way I wanted to.

"So Bella, how's the nightmares?" He asked as I spit my drink out all over my dinner. "Are they any better? Are they why you were using again in New York? We seen you at your New Years Eve concert in Times Square. I knew you were using then. I just knew it." he said the last part as he looked down in his plate.

I sighed."Yes and no. They went away but came back full force."

"Why?"

"Long story."I whisper as I look to Alice. She was waiting to see what I would say."Edward Can I ask you something?" I carefully approached what I wanted to ask.

"Sure anything you want Bella. You know that."

"Angela, does she make you happy? Does she fill the void? Do you love her? Is she good to you?"

"Um...Yes, What void? I think so? Possibly and yes she's good to me. Why?" He asked all confused at my questions.

"Do you remember LA?"

"I've never been to LA Bella. You know that."

My chin hit the ground "Oh."Was all I could manage.


	12. Chapter 12 Please Remember

A/N: I dont own any thing having to do with the Twilight Story line. I just make the Characters play out the twisted fantasies I have playing like movies in my head. ;)

Chapter 12 Please Remember...

EPOV

"Edward get your ass over here now. She's been screaming non-stop since about one am. It's now two thirty and I need my beauty rest. Jasper has tried and tried to calm her but nothing helps. I'm sure mom and dad can hear her all the way to their house."

"I'm not sure what I can do Alice but I'll come out and try. Why me?" 

"Well duh dipshit when she had these things before you were the only one to stop them. So get your ass over here and shut her up."

"Ok I'm on my way."

-_TFL_-

"Thank God you're here."

"Oh my God, did she take anything?" 

"No she's been with me most of the day. But I don't know the signs."

"Well if she takes anything its to stop this. She's not taken anything." I said a little unsure but if the screaming was any indication I can almost assure she hadn't taken anything.

I crawled into bed withBella and wrapped my arms around her and started to whisper calming words to her like I had before I sent her to rehab. Flashes of Bella and I laughing and laying in bed watching Tv started to run through my mind. I noticed that Bella had quietened down and I went to get up but she clung to me and whimpered. That sound broke my heart and I just had to stay. I kicked off my shoes and settled into the covers with her pulled to me.

-_TFL_-

"Holy Fuck! What are you doing here?" Bella screamed.

I jumped up and rubbed my eyes. "Alice called me at two am because you was having a nightmare and Jasper couldn't calm you down. Everytime I moved you cried or whimpered so I stayed."

"Oh, um... Thank you. You always had that calming effect on me. Thank you again." She mumbled to me.

I sat up beside her on the bed. "You were talking about LA in your sleep. What happened in LA?"

"You really don't remember?"

I shook my head. "No."

"You sang to me and asked me to be your girlfriend. I really wish you could remember." She said wistfully.

"I do too. I do too. I'm sorry."

"Me too." she whispered.

"Well I really need to go. I have to get ready for work." As I pulled on my shoes and left I had the biggest sense of loss I had ever felt in my life almost like I was leaving a part of me behind. I just shook it off as I called Angela.

-_TFL_-

BPOV

"I'm so sorry Alice."

"Its ok Bella. I have no idea what to so in those situations."

"I shouldn't have put you in that postion though." I said again as Alice's phone buzzed. She answered it So I ran up and took a shower and dressed for the day. I felt so wiped out. These dreams always took so much out of me. More than the ones from Ben and Tylers attack. As I ran back down the stairs Alice stopped me.

"Hey Bella, Edward and Angela want you to join them for lunch today."

"Uh...sure...I guess." I said a little unsure.

"She said sure. They said meet them at Olive Garden around one."

"Ok. " I sighed. Could I really watch the love of my life love someone else? I guess I have no other choice.

"Earth to Bella. Hello Wake up!"

"Sorry Alice. I was thinking."

"About?"

"God you're nosey aren't you? About LA if you must know. I wish I could help him remember."

"We have been trying, don't get me wrong, we like Angela but she's not you. We can tell he's not one hundred percent into the relationship. If only there was a recording of the radio broadcast where he confessed his love to you."

"Wait a minute," I said as I jumped up and ran to get my phone."There is, Lance has one." I sent him a text and had him email the recording to Alice's email address. Alice said she would find a way to get Edward to listen to it without telling him what it was.

-_TFL_-

I arrived at Olive Garden a little after one and Edward and Angela was waiting out side for me. "Sorry I'm late."

"You're fine." Angela said as she hugged me.

Lunch ws fun and Angela was really a sweet girl. I couldn't help but like her even if I did want to steal her fiance. Edward went to pull the car around after we had finished and I took the time to talk to Angela alone.

"Hey Angela."

"Yes?" 

"Edwards a great guy. Be good to him ok? He's been through a lot." I said as a tear slipped down my cheek This guy could still meak me feel like a pansy.

"What do you mean?" She asked really confused.

"He's helped me through a lot of tough times in the last three years, even took a bullet for me but he doesn't remember that."

"Really?"

"Yeah, well I'm going to go. It was really nice getting to know you. Thanks for lunch." I left her there to think about that as the tears started to pour. When I made it to my car I had to wait for them to ease up before I drove back to Alice's house.

-_TFL_-

EPOV

"Edward, Can I ask you something?"

"Sure Ang, What is it?"

"Did you and Bella ever have a relationship?" She asked as I took a drink of my tea at dinner.

"Um... I don't know. Why?"

"We had a conversation while we were waiting for you to bring the car around today. I think she's still in love with you."

"Nah, we were just really good friends." I replied but I couldn't shake that thought. Was Bella in love with me? Did we ever have a relationship? Angela went home and I decided to surf the internet. I typed in Bella Swan and out of all the articles one caught my eye. It was from the Seattle Times and was about two guys kidnapping her and myself going into save her and getting shot. FBI agents caught the guys and they were sentenced to life with no chance of parole ever. Funny thing was I couldn't remember any of it. I picked up the phone and called Emmett.

"Hello?" His voice came over the speaker on my desk.

"Hey Bro. Do you remember Bella getting kidnapped and me getting shot?...EMMETT?:"

"Yes, If not for her you would be fine now."

"I am fine Emmett, I just can't remember a big chucnk of the last three years. What happened in LA?"

"Nothing."

"Are you sure Emmett?"

"Yes Edward I"m sure." Emmett growled.

"If you won't tell me I'll ask someone who will."

"Do it. Edward. I'm not telling you anything.." Emmett growled as he hung up on me.

I dialed Alice's number.

"Hello?" she said as she picked up after only one ring.

"Alice, what happened in LA?"

"Check your email. I'm sending you something as we speak."

I opened my email and clicked on the file that Alice sent. My voice filled the room singing _Here by me_ and asking Bella to be my girlfriend. Then Bella's voice came on the line saying yes she would. "Alice, why am I not with her now?"

"She left because the FBI put her in protective custody and we lost contact. Plus you had amnesia" She proceeded to tell me everything that had happened between Bella's release from rehab and her showing up in Seattle. Little flickers started to come to me. "Edward she completes you in more ways than Angela ever could."

I knew what she was saying I just didn't want to believe it. I love Angela, but I'm starting to realize I don't love her like I should.

"Edward if you marry Angela, you are not being fair to her, yourself or Bella. You will only hurt Angela in the end." She said after I was silent for the longest time.

I went to bed that night more confused than ever. I dreamt of Bella and I walking down the aisle with Charlie giving her away. I dreamt of our babies. Funny thing is that I had dreamt of this constantly but it was never Angela's face I seen it wsa always Bella. I just now realized that. Fuck what was I going to do?


	13. Chapter 13 Stepping through the glass

A/N: Blah blah blah You know the drill. I don't own twilight but I do own the song that Bella sings in the end. Now get to reading I'm dying to know what you think. ;)

Chapter 13 Stepping through the glass

EPOV

I awoke the nest morning still confused as ever. I decided to mess around on my piano. It's been forever since I had played. I sat down at the piano and started to play anything I could recall. As I finished I noticed a piece of paper under the edge of the rug under the piano. I picked it up and realized it was the song Bella has wrote when she was holed up here in this room. She was high as a kite when she wrote it. I can't believe it's still here. She had titled it My Glass Box. I folded it up and stuck it in my wallet. I decided to fix some breakfast. As I was starting my bacon the door bell rang.

"Angela, pleasant surprise...Wait what's wrong? Why are you crying? Why aren't you at work?"

"We need to talk." She simply whispered. That's never a good sign.

"Uh.. Ok.. Come on in. I was just making breakfast. Do you want anything?"

"No. I'm fine."

"Ok, well come sit at the bar while I cook and we can talk."

"Edward, I've been thinking. I was so happy when you asked me out. I mean a guy lke you finding a girl like me interesting. We had so much fun together but I always felt like you hadn't gave yourself one hundred percent to me and at lunch yesterday I realized why. I mean I accepted your proposal because I figured you would eventually fall in love with me but again after lunch yesterday I could see why. You may not realize this but you gravitate to her, your pulled to her. She loves you unconditionally and I think you love her too you just don't realize or remember that. When she gave me her tear filled approval, I couldn't get the look of pure and utter heart break out of my head. And when she said you took a bullet for her, I knew then you would love her more than you do me. And when later down the road and your memory returned you would hate me or come to resent me for not saying anything. So with that being said here is your ring back. We both know that I'm not the person it was meant for. I'm really sorry Edward but I want us both to be happy and together we will never be truly happy." She said throughout the tears.

I placed her hand between mine and looked deep into her eyes. I had to make her see I never meant for any of this to happen."Angela? I'm sorry I never meant to hurt you. Can you forgive me?"

"I'm not mad at you Edward or Bella. I mean I always wondered why we never had sex or anything. I would rather it be Bella Swan than another guy." She said with a strained laugh.

"You seriously thought I was gay?"

"Well we were never intimate and never got real close. We were more like friends that kissed and held hands occasionally. I would love to stay friends with you and get to know Bella."

I hugged Angela as she left to head to work. I shook my head to clear my thoughts after I closed the door behind her. I picked up my phone and dialed Alice as I turned off the eye under my burnt bacon."Hey Al, are you busy?"

"No not really just designing something for Bella to wear this weekend. She's performing at Smooth."

"Angela just broke off the engagement."

"WAIT! WHAT?" Alice screamed in my ear. I had to hold it out a bit to hear her normally.

"She told me she knew why we never got close. Because I was still in love with someone else."

"That someone else being Bella right?"

"Yeah, only she's not mad at me though. She wants us all to remain friends."

"So what are you going to do?"

"What should I do Alice?"

"Well I guess you need to start by remembering."

"Bits and pieces are coming back to me. The more I hang around Bella the more that comes to me out of the blue. Oh I have something for Bella. I found it in my music room."

"She's here so come on over."

-_TFL_-

BPOV

I was in the middle of my Zumba work out when there was a knock on the door.

"Edward, Hey, What's up?"

"I found this in my music room toay. You wrote it while you were staying with me."

I opened it up and it was the song I wrote while I was so messed up. "I forgot all about this. Thank you." I hugged him "Do you want to come in?"

"No thanks though, I need to go talk to Emmett."

"Oh ok, Bye then." I said as he walked down the stairs. Rose was coming up as he was going down. I was not prepared for this, But before I could do or say anything she pulled me into a bear hug.

"Welcome back sis. I'll kick your ass if you do anything like that again."

"You're not mad at me Rosalie?"

"No, it wasn't anything you had control of. Why would I be mad?"

"Emmett blames me for everything."

"He blames everyone but himself. He knew it was a possibility that Edward would get shot That's why he put that bullett proof vest on him. If he hadn't insisted that he wear it, Edward would be dead. Let me handle Emmett. So what's this I hear about you performing at Smooth this weekend?"

"Yeah, Jasper asked if I would come and sing a song or two."

"What are you wearing?"

"Alice is designing something as we speak."

"Of course she is. Well we will be there. If I have to drag monkey man by his toenails we will be there."

-_TFL_-

I had worked with Lance all week to get the song that Edward found set to music. It was going to be the song I sang at the club tonight. I could barely get through it without crying so I hoped I could tonight. I dressed in the outfit that Alice had made. Black skinny jeans with tiny sparkly pink pin stripes and a A black off the shoulder mesh top and hot pink lacy tank top underneath. I pulled on my docs and Alice piled on the makeup. We were to meet everyone there later. This would be my first appearance without the other members of Black Swan.

I walked on stage with Lance behind me on the piano. As I looked out to the crowd I took a deep breath, nodded to Lance and he started in as I waited for my cue I seen Edward sit down next to Alice.

_I wait for you to see me _

_you put me here but _

_you don't want me_

_and no one else can_

_I wait and wait_

_but this glass box _

_shrinks_

_I refuse to believe_

_anyone could love me_

_your broken angel_

_I feel so small _

_and you make me disappear_

_I am drowning _

_in my own tears_

_I taste your hate_

_I wait and wait _

_but this glass box_

_shrinks_

_I refuse to believe_

_anyone could love me _

_your broken Angel_

_Your love it means _

_nothing with this _

_glass box_

_through the glass_

_I want to touch you_

_but I watch you _

_touch her with _

_your lips that_

_I long to kiss_

_I wait and wait_

_but this glass box_

_shrinks_

_I refuse to believe_

_anyone could love me_

_your broken angel_

_My glass box_

_it hurts_

_yet it feels so much_

_like home_

_where we will never _

_be that close_

_to wak and feel _

_your breath on my neck_

_I wait and wait _

_but this glass box _

_shrinks_

_I refuse to believe _

_anyone could love me_

_your broken angel_

_she takes your hand_

_and leads you away_

_from this glass box_

_that has shattered_

_your heart_

_because you loved me_

_and I refused to believe_

_anyone could love_

_me the broken_

_angel that was_

_your love_

_I wait and wait _

_but this glass box _

_shrinks_

_because I refuse to _

_believe you could love me _

_your broken Angel_

As I finished I could hear the applause but all I could see was Edward in front of the stage with tears in his eyes. I ran off the stage and out the door.

"Bella wait. Please wait." Edward yelled at me as I ran for the nearest Taxi. I got in and gave the driver the address of the house I had Rose build for me. I just couldn't face Edward or everyone yet. I felt so raw after that performance and I really couldn't tell you why.


	14. Chapter 14 Rising through the Ashes

A/N:Don't own Twilight but I so wish I did because if I then I would be doing really wouldn't I? Sorry about the delay in updating holidays and then well lots of real life getting in the way. Spent december depressed but im better now. Bella put her self on the line last chapter lets see what happens shall we...Now turn the page. ;)

Chapter 14 Rising through the Ashes.

BPOV

I am such a coward, a big fucking coward. I ran from the club and hid in the basement of the house Rose built for me so that no one would know I was here. I kept my cell off, much to Lance's disappoinment and informed Ana and Rob to tell anyone looking for me they had no idea where I was, well everyone but Lance.I made him promise the same thing. See I'm a coward.

"Bella, dear, can we talk for a few minutes?" Ana asked as she walked into the room with a tray of food.

"Sure. What's up?" I asked as I looked up from the book I was reading.

"Well, Love, Its you. You're running away from love. How long do you think youcan hide from it? It will find you, whether you want it to or not."

"Ana," I sighed, "I konw, I guess I'm scared. I love Edward so much, but I had prepared myself to let him marry Angela but now I'm not so sure what to do. Angela broke off their engagement."

"Well isn't that what you wanted?"

"I came back to make sure everyone was ok. I came here thinking Edward had died. I was shocked to find out he was very much alive. Before you say anything I seriously thought I was hallucinating when I seen him with Alice and Jasper at my New Years show. Then to realize he hardly remembered me let alone the things we shared was overwhelming. Now my heart doesn't know what to feel."

"No offense, but this isn't the Bella I know and love. The Bella I know would go after what she wants no matter what. This Bella..." she said waving her hands at me like I was a prize in a game show, "I don't know her. My Bella would never hide."

"I don't know who I am anymore. This has shaken me. What do I do Ana?"

"Maybe talk to Dr. Vullen next door. He might be able to explain Edward's condition to you and help you see his side. Once you know maybe you can decide what to do. I konw you love him or you wouldn't have cast his doppleganger in that video of yours. Bella, dear, just open your heart back up. You have kept it closed for so long. Just open up dear let someone else in. Let Edward and the gang back in. You deserve to be happy. You've been miserable for so long. Let Charlie and Renee in, they are a part of you that you need to know." She said as she hugged me tight. "Don't be mad at me for speaking my mind but I have seen you mope way too long."

"I could never be mad at you Ana."

I sat there staring at the tv screen lost in thought. I decided I would call Dr. Cullen before I came out of my self imposed isolation. I looked at the clock to check the time. Damn Midnight. The day has so slipped away.

-TFL-

"Hello Dr. Cullen speaking."

"Hi Dr. Cullen. It's Bella, Bella Swan. How are you today? Do you have time to talk to me for a few minutes?" I rushed out without breathing.

"Breathe Bella. I was beginning to wonder if you were going to call at all."

"Huh?" smooth Bella.

"I heard you were back in town. I hoped to hear from you sooner. I'm just glad you actually called."

"Oh..Ok. Anyways if I'm bothering you I'll call back another time." See my coward is showing herself again.

"No no you are fine. I'm assuming you want to talk about Edward?"

"Yes. Why can he remember everything but our time together? I don't understand that."

"It's a lot to take in I'm sure. I understand you believed he was deceased from the time you left til you returned?"

"Yes."

"I'm sorry about that. If we had a way to contact you we would have. Anyways, back to Edward and his condition. Everyone's body handles things differently than the next person. You handled your issues with nightmares, drugs and alcohol. Edwards body chose amnesia. Selective Amnesia to be more exact. He forgot everything related to the pain. Since you've came back, he's remembering and healing a little faster than before. Emmett is healing too. He reaaly doesn't blame you. He just doesn't want to realize that it wasn't anyone's fault Edward got shot. If anything it was his persistence Edward wear the vest that saved Edward's life. Does that answer your questions?"

"Yes sir, it does...I...Thank you ."

"Please Bella call me are family dear. Esme and I can't wait to see you again."

"Thank you Carlisle." I hung up and just sat at the bar in the kitchen. I had finally ventured upstairs for the first time in the month since I had ran of f the stage and out of the club. The doorbell rang and I ran and hid where I could still hear as Ana answered the door. See coward has reappeared. It was just a delivery guy.

"Bella, you have a package. It's from Edward."

"What is it?"

"I don't know. Come open it."

I came and took the box from Ana and sat it on the bar. The box wasn't very big and was very light. I pulled off the tapeand pulled back the flaps. I removed the tissue paper packing and revealed a small book. There was a note taped to the cover of the book.

_Dearest Bella_

_ I read this book recently and was blown away at how much the heroine of the story reminded me of you. The girl faced her demons head on and won despite the odds she never gave up. No matter what was in her way, she never gave up. I hope you will open your heart to me, I know we both have some healing to do so let's help each other heal. On the back page I have taped a surprise for you. I found it in my laptops memory. I can't believe I couldn't see then what I see now. Just don't look until you read the story maybe then you will understand. The song you sang was incredible and very haunting. Someone recorded your performance and placed it on youtube. Almost everyone commented on how they could feel your pain and heartbreak. I miss you Bella and I can honestly say I miss us. I've started to remember more and more of us everyday._

_ Love Always:_

_ Edward_

The book 'Facing Demons' was staring back at me and believe me I was tempted to turn to the back page and see what he was talking about but didn't. I grabbed a soda out of the fridge and picked up the book. I walked over to the sofa and started to read. I was still reading several hours later when Ana brought me a sandwich and tea for lunch. I was reading the last page when she brought me dinner.

"This is a really good book, Ana. Josie faced her parents murderer, a back stabbing best friend and a psychopathic ex boyfriend and didn't let it stop her from finding true love with the detective that helped her through the whole ordeal. Wait what's this?"

I turned the very last page in the book and there staring back at me was a picture someone had taken of Edward and I back in LA. We were sitting side by side just staring at each other but I could see the love in his eyes mirrored in my own. On the back he simply wrote _'Can you see it?'_

Tears filled my eyes as I looked at Ana. "Well, I know what I need to do."

"About time love. It's about time."

"What is today?"

"Wednesday."

"Well then I have an appointment with Dr. Cullen tomorrow. Better get cleaned up." I said as I winked at her.

I finished dinner and helped Ana clean up the dishes. I showered and shaved all vital parts and managed to fall asleep around midnight. I awoke around 8 feeling refreshed and energized for the first time in years. I kept myself busy by heading to the workout room until around ten. I took a shower and dressed in my ripped skinny jeans, blue destructed t-shirt and knee high converse tennis shoes, threw on my black pea coat, grabbed my phone, license and credit card and stuck them in my back pocket. I grabbed my keys and headed out.

"Hi welcome to Cullen Family Practice. How may I help you?" The blonde bimbo behind the counter said between chomps on her chewing gum. I swear this chick is half cow.

"I need to speak to Dr. Cullen please."

"Dr. Edward or Dr. Carlisle?" 

"Edward, please?"

"Do you have an appointment?" she asked as she studied her nails.

"No this is important."

"You'll have to make an appointment. We have next friday at three thirty. Is that good for you?" Oh hell no she didn't just go there. I swear the bitch smirked at me.

"I really need to talk to him now. This is personal and important."

"I'm sure, but he's booked up til next friday."

"What's your name?"

"Lauren Johnson."

"Well Lauren if you want to tick me off keep it up, but if you want to make me go away go and get Edward."

"I don't take kindly to threats ma'am." She practically yelled giving me the bitch brow.

I was almost over the counter and ripping her hair out by the ratty excuse for a dye job pony tail when I heard Carlisle.

"Bella, dear, what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I came to talk to Edward but super bitch here kept putting me off til next friday. That's just not a good idea if you get my drift."

"No, I don't think it is. Come with me. Lauren I will deal with you later." I could tell by the look on his face that she was in trouble. She could too. "This is Edward's office. He's in with his last patient til after lunch now. He will come straight here. I'm going to let this be a surprise to him. Now to deal with a soon to be ex-employee. You never talk to family the way she talked to you. I heard the last part. I just wanted to make sure it was you." He hugged me and left me to wait for Edward. Twenty minutes later I heard Edward outside the door.

"Thanks dad. I'll see you at two." he said as the door knob turned. I rose from the chair I had been sitting in and straightened my shirt.

"Hello Edward."

"Bella!"


	15. Chapter 15 All I Can Do Is love you

The Finish Line 

A/N: I do not own anything the characters I do own a nice pair of hot pink tennis shoes. I am very sad to say this is the conclusion of The Finish Line. There will be an epilogue in the near future but this will be the last of the regular updates...Wait I never was regular. Forgive me for that RL was a bear this last few months. This story was a joy to write and really hit me hard. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it and sharing it with you. With out further delay on we go.

Chapter 15 All I can do is Love you the best I can

"Hey Edward. I hope it's ok that I surprised you. I had to to talk to you. Your dad had to help me get past the wicked bitch of the desk up there. She wasn't going to let me see you. She wanted me to wait until next week. I really don't think I could wait that long." I pushed out without taking a breath. If he could tell I was nervous he didn't mention it.

"Want to join me for lunch? We can talk then. I'm famished." he asked with a smile still plastered on his gorgeous face.

"Of course I will." I smiled back at him.

He ushered me out of his office and towards the front door. Along the way we passed the receptionist who was still getting reamed out by Carlisle. I grinned at her as we passed and when I felt Edward's hand slip lower on my back I turned and wiggled my fingers at her in a little wave over my shoulder. I could hear Carlisle trying to get her attention as we walked out the door.

We arrived shortly at the little mexican restaurant and after being seated we ordered water and fajitas.

"Edward, I read the book, the story was so touching and moving. I know that I have a lot of healing to do. I think that maybe you do too. Why don't we heal together? I mean... Hell what I'm trying to say is I love you. It's taken me this long to put it into words and get my head out of my ass." I stated.

"Bella stop right there. I love you too. Yes we have a lot of work to do between us and it's not going to be easy. I could never imagine what you have been through. I believe in you and I believe you can do this. It just took some reminders to get my memories back. With Angela, there was always something missing, now I know what it was. It was you. It will always be you." He said without taking his eyes off of me.

"So can we start again? Can we be like it was in LA.?" I asked pushing the chicken around on the plate.

He reached across the table and gently lifted my face to look at him. "Hey look at me. There's nothing I want more."

"Two fucked up people in a fucked up world." I laughed out.

"No, Bella, two fucked up people trying to make sense of a fucked up world." He said with that crooked smile I loved.

Conversation flowed easily throughout the rest of lunch as we caught up on the last three years.

"Well as much as I hate to I really need to go back to work. I would love to cancel all my appointments for the day and stay with you but that's ok we can catch up at dinner." He said as he paid the bill and left a nice tip.

"That would be nice. I really need to go talk to Alice anyways. Do you think Emmett will ever forgive me?"

"Emmett's not really mad at you. He never was. He just chose to take it out on you. I'll talk to him. Alice misses you terribly by the way."

"Is she at the shop?" I asked

"Should be. I'll drop you off there. She can bring you by the office at five."

"What about my car?"

"You can get it after dinner." he said.

I looked out the window of his car as we pulled up to Mad Rabbit. "Have fun at work and don't work too hard." I said as I started to get out.

"Never." he said as he leaned over and kissed my cheek. "Bye Bella."

As I walked into the store I heard Alice. "Welcome to Mad Rabbit. If we don't have what you're looking for, then you're in the wrong store. I'll be with you in a minute." she said without looking up.

She was busy helping some teenager chose the right outfit for a dance she was going to, but soon she finished ans noticed me perusing the racks.

"Don't bother bitch, you already have everything on that rack." she said with a huge smile.

"Alice, I'm so sorry if I...' I started to say but was interrupted by a fierce hug.

"All that matters is this...Do you love my brother?" She asked.

"Of course You know I do."

"Then disappear on us again and I'll cut your crazy ass throat. Got it?"

"Yeah, I got it.I get to hang with you here until Edward gets off work. So what do you need me to do?"

"Tell me what I have missed out on the last little bit. You stayed holed up in your house since you sang at the club."

"Well you know the crazy blonde that worked the front desk at the office?" I asked interrupting her story about the neighbors dog and Jasper getting into a barking contest one night when he had been drinking.

"Yeah, Lauren I think. What about her?" she asked

"I think I got her fired today."

"No way! How?"

I relayed the story about how she talked to me and that Carlisle over heard and him chewing her out and her glaring at Edward and I as we left.

"Oh my God that cow has wanted Edward since the day they hired her. I tried to warn them but they didn't listen, besides who can compete with Bella Swan the superstar?" She deadpanned.

I pushed her and laughed as her phone buzzed.

"Hello...Yeah...Ok...I'll call him bye."

"You know Alice, this feels good, to laugh and to really live. To live without the drugs and alcohol's feels good to have my friends back."

"What happened to Charlie and Renee?" She asked as she started to close the shop up.

"I'm still working on them. Unfortunately I shut them out when I shut everyone else out."

"Well they need you too. Let's go. It's closing time."

We sang along to crazy songs on the radio all the way to Edward's office.

"Hey dad, Hey Edward. Where's Lauren?" Alice asked innocently

"At home I guess. I couldn't let her talk to Bella like that. I just hope she hasn't talked to any of our patients that way. By the way, I'm sorry about that Bella." Carlisle apologized.

"It's ok." I said as Edward came up beside me and draped his arms around my shoulders. "I missed you." He whispered in my ear.

I just smiled at him.

"Let's get out of here. I'm starved." Carlisle announced

"Let's go eat." Edward said as he led me to his car.

We arrived at a little family owned restaurant called Darrion's steakhouse only to find Edward's whole family waiting for us. I looked at him in shock and he just pulled me closer and tried to assure me it was ok with a smile.

"Oh hell no. I'm not staying if she's here." Emmett yelled loud enough to disturb most of the people in the place. Rose just buried her face in her hands in embarassment.

I stared down at my feet. "Emmett sit down. There's somethings we need to discuss." Carlisle said firmly.

"Dad, she's the reason Edward got hurt." he protested.

"Emmett, no she's not. If I hadn't went in that warehouse, she would be dead, If you hadn't insisted on me wearing that bullet proof vest I would be dead. It's no one's fault. Can't you see that?" Edward argued.

"Are you ready to order or do you need a few more minutes?" The waitress asked showing up to an awkward silence.

"Give us a few more minutes please dear." Esme said softly as the waitress nodded and wondered off.

"Emmett, I'm terribly sorry anyone got hurt. I really am. My shrink has been working on it with me forever now. Please forgive me. I never meant for any of it to happen. You will never know the amount of nights I have cried myself to sleep because I honestly believed that Edward was dead. Then I found out he was still alive. Do you know how that felt? To honestly think the love of your life was gone and you never had the chance to tell them that you loved them? The agents would never tell me anything I was sick with grief and regrets. Then I had to prepare my heart to let him love another person when I found out he was engaged to Angela. Now I have the chance to show him how much I do love him, but I have a lot of things to fix and so does he. So why not fix it together? So Emmett, I beg of you, please don't hate me. Forgive me please?" I pleaded with Emmett.

He didn't speak but sat back down. We finally ordered our dinner and ate among a lively was silent with thought but still participated in the converstions a little bit.

Later when Edward dropped me off at my car, he wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tight. "Everything will be ok. I promise." he said as he captured my lips with his and soon we both were grasping for air. "Be careful Bella. I'll call you later ok? I love you."

"I love you too. Please be careful yourself." I said as he kissed me again before getting in his car and waiting for me to pull out before he left himself. On the way home I could feel the weight of the world lift off my shoulders and I could tell that everything would be ok.


	16. Chapter 16 Complete

Chapter 16 Complete

A/N: I do not own Any of the characters but I have a nice sore throat and itchy eyes. Hope you enjoy this chaper.

As I paced back and forth in the green room I just couldn't believe my luck the last few years. I mean a horrible situation brought me to find wonderful friends, the man of my dreams and a family that I didn't know I had.

"You're on in about 10 minutes Bella." Lance reminded me as I passed him for the ten thousandth time.

"Yeah I know. I can't do this. I think I'm going to be sick."I mumbled as I started to run my hand through my hair. I stopped when the hair lady glared at me. She was sick of trying to keep it looking good.

"You'll be fine. You got this. It's no different that going on stage and singing your heart out. Like I said you're going to blow them out of the water. They have been trying to get you on this show for the last few years. I wouldn't book it until I knew for sure you could handle it. This is your time to shine."

"You're right. I got this. I fucking got this shit." I said as I jumped up and down.

"Ms. Swan get ready thirty seconds." The intern said as he stuck his head into the room and motioned for me to follow him.

I listened to the monologue and laughed with the audience as the jokes were told and executed with excellent timing. I started to hyperventilate when I felt Lance's hand on my back. He leaned in and whispered encouraging words into my ear. I took a deep breath and began to calm myself again.

"Ladies and gentlemen we have a great show for you guest for the night has lived through hell and back only to remain on top of the charts. She is truly a role model for others. I would like you all to welcome the wonderful and talented Bella Swan." 

The intern pushed me out towards the curtain reminding me to smile and wave. I felt like one of the penguins from Madagascar. You know just smile andwave boys, just smile and wave.

"Hi, Jay. Thanks for having me."

"Thanks for finally coming to join us. What made you finally decide to come on?"

"Well, as you know to begin with I was trying to hide from my past. I know stupid as it was, I was hiding in plain sight but still didn't want to push my luck. But now, all that's behind me now."

"You have a new record out, a new man in your life and a book coming out. You've been a busy girl."

"Yeah, I have." I laughed nervously. I could feel this interview going down hill fast.

"What's the book about?"

"Well, it's basically my life story. Someone out there found it interesting enough to want to sit down with me and listen to me ramble on and they actually wrote it up."

"Have you read it?"

"Yea, I didn't want to put something out there that wasn't truthful. I put it all out there."

"So who is this mysterious guy we have all heard about?" Jay asked

"Oh my gosh, He is just the best. He was there for me when I thought I was lost for good. I had no friends seeing as how I was pushing Lance away. No family and when I ran from Sam and his crap I ended up in Seattle. While shopping for clothes I met Alice and she was so much like me we became fast friends and I soon became friends with her friends and family. Her brother was quietly in the background but I felt drawn to him I couldn't explain it but if I was close to breaking down or I woke screaming he was there. He could calm me when nothing else could except when I got high. Our relationship had its ups and downs."

"He asked you to be his girlfriend over the radio right?"

"haha yes. He secretly managed to get the host of my fav show let him come on, play his guitar and sing to me. It was the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me."

"He took a bullet for you? He seems like a keeper."

"Yeah, When I was kidnapped by two guys from my past, he found me and took a bullet to the chest in the process. Luckily his brother made him wear that vest. He suffered some memory loss due to Post traumatic stress disorder. He since regained his memories that he lost."

"So this new album _The Best Of Me _this is a little bit of a change for you isn't it?"

"Yes this is my first album with out all the anger and rage. The sound is different. I felt like it was time for this."

"What are you going to sing for us?"

"Its called That's why I love you. I wrote it for my mystery man. I loved him but not because of his pretty face or the fact that he was nice to every one but because of everything about him and that he was still here even though we had been through hell and back together."

"After this break we will get to hear that song."

I sighed in relief and shook Jay's hand. His chin was really big even in person. I walked over to the other side of the stage where the band was setting up. I grabbed the guitar and started to strum around warming my fingers up.

"Ladies and Gentlemen I give you Bella Swan and Black Swan"

_La la _

_la la la la_

_La la _

_la la la_

_I like your smile_

_I like your vibe_

_I like your style_

_but that's not why I love you_

_and I, I like the way_

_you're such a star_

_but that's not why I love you_

_hey_

_Do you feel, Do you feel me?_

_Do you feel what I feel, too?_

_Do you need, do you need me?_

_Do you need me?_

_You're so beautiful_

_but that's not why I love you_

_I'm not sure you know_

_That the reason I love you is you_

_being you_

_Just you_

_Yeah the reason I love you is all that we've been through _

_and that's why I love you_

_la la_

_la la la la_

_la la_

_la la la_

_I like the way you misbehave_

_when we get wasted_

_but that's not why I love you_

_and how you keep your cool_

_when I'm complicated_

_but that's not why I love you_

_Hey _

_do you feel, do you feel me?_

_Do you feel what I feel, too?_

_Do you need, Do you need me?_

_Do you need me?_

_You're so beautiful_

_but that's not why I love you_

_I'm not sure you know_

_that the reason I love you is you_

_being you_

_just you_

_yeah the reason I love you is all that we've been through_

_and that's why I love you_

_la la_

_la la la l(oh oh)_

_La la_

_la la la (That's why I love you)_

Jay walked over to me and patted me on the back."I heard that you had an excellent memory. Is that true?"

"Um yeah, I guess?" uh oh this was not an agreed upon part of the show.

"Ok, I'm going to blindfold you and when I take it off you will have to tell me what has changed. Are you game?"

"Uh, yeah. Sure. Why not?" I stuttered.

They brought out a small black silk tie looking thing and tied it around my face. I heard chairs rattling and someone trying to tell someone else to be quiet.

"Ok, are you ready?" Jay said as he turned me around.

"Yeah." I said as he took the blindfold off.

I turned and there was Edward. I couldn't help the blinding smile that took over my face. " I thought you couldn't make it." I blurted out before he could say anything.

He smiled at me and took my hand as he got down on one knee. Holy Shit. No way is he going to do what I think he is? I couldn't help all the thoughts that ran throughout my head.

"Bella, I know we have been through some seriously crazy stuff in the short time we have known each other. I fell in love with your spirit and determination. I saw the heart of an angel even when you were lost and couldn't find yourself. I was facinated by your talent and enthralled by your beauty. You captivated me when I had given up on ever being happy. You've shown me how to be a fighter and gave me so much more than I could ever give you. With that being said. Would you do me the honor of becoming Mrs. Edward Cullen?" He opened this little blue box from Tiffany's and inside was this gorgeous ring the band had square cut diamonds set in a channel with a huge round diamond in the center. I felt the tears start to fall a little heavier down my face. The studio was so quiet waiting for my response that you could hear a pin drop. I looked from the ring to Edward and to the ring again before settling on his face. I didn't trust my voice to stick around so I just nodded and dropped to my knees in front of him and kissed him hoping he could feel how much I love him.

"I loved the song by the way. When did you find time to write it?" Edward whispered into my ear.

"That's our show for tonight. Have a goodnight everyone." Jay said as he closed the show.

I collected my things and walked back to the green room and headed back out to the limo, stopping to sign autographs on the way. Once we were inside and on our way back to my hotel I found my voice again.

"How the hell did you manage to pull this off?" I asked as I looked at Edward.

"I asked Lance after you asked me if I could come with you if he would help me get it done. He did and so here we are. I'm glad you said yes by the way. I would have felt like a fool out there if you had said no." He rambled.

"Wow." was all I could say. I was looking forward to getting Esme and Renee to help me plan this.

**A/N: I don't own the song Bella sang in this chapter. It is Avril Lavigne's I love you. Love the upbeat attitude of this song. OK thought this was going to be the final chapter but I guess not. One more and that will be it. That chapter will be further on in the future after the wedding. Should I give them kids or not? Twins? Many kids, or just one kid? Let me know in your reviews.**


	17. Chapter 17 Happily Ever After

The Finish Line

Chapter 17 Happily Ever after

A/N: I don't own Twilight or any of the great characters. I just play with them a little bit then stick them back on the shelf. Here is the conclusion that has been floating around in my head for some time. Hope you enjoy it.

JPOV

"Ok everyone get ready. They are coming up the drive now." Alice said as everyone scrambled to hide.

Jasper flipped the lights off and ran and crouched down behind the couch beside his wife. A surprise anniversary party, who would have thought it? Alice, his lovely wife of course, would be the only person in the world to do this for a retired pop star and her husband. He held his breath as he heard the front door open.

"Edward, what do you think of Anna Grace?" Bella said as they walked through the door into the foyer.

"I don't know it sounds too plain for our daughter. How about Rynn?" he said as he guided her into the living room.

"SURPRISE!" everyone yelled as he flipped on the lights.

"What the crap?" Bella gasped as she put her hand to her chest to settle her racing heart.

"Happy Anniversary Bella." Alice whispered as she hugged her tight. "We couldn't let you get by without celebrating could we?"

"I tried to stop her Bell, but you know how she gets from time to time." Jasper said as he hugged Bella.

"Guess what Bella? I just started designing your maternity clothes. Styling wear for the mother with attitude. You're just going to love it."

"I'm sure I will Alice." Bella laughed as she looked around and was thankful for her little family and friends. They had all been through so much in the last few years.

EPOV

There was Charlie and Renee, they had gotten closer and were trying to become a family again. Then Esme and Carlisle she was so thankful they had never give up on her. Emmett eventually came around after Rosalie made him go to counseling. Alice, Jasper, James, Ana and Rob rounded out our little group of family and friends. We had just found out we were expecting a little over a month ago and everyone was over the moon about it, Especially Bella. We had married on the beach of Isle Esme last year after a year long engagement. Bella had to finish her tour and wanted Esme, Alice, Rosalie and Renee to help her plan everything out. It was Dad that suggested the destination, seeing as it was the most private location and reporters and the paparazzi would never find it.

I can remember it like it was yesterday. I held back the tears as she walked towards me on Charlie's arm barefooted, looking like a goddess and siren wrapped all in one. I couldn't help but smile as I vowed to love her until both our hearts stopped beating. I just couldn't imagine at the time it would include children.

"Dude you got it bad." Emmett said as he elbowed me in the ribs.

"Sorry man. I just can't stop thinking how lucky I am." I said never taking my eyes off Bella. As if she could sense me staring at her she looked up from where she was being fussed over by our mothers and winked at me and waved.

"You're just whipped. Admit it man. Hell, I'll admit it we are all whipped. There's not a thing in the world we wouldn't do for those ladies sitting there." Jasper said with at smile.

Emmett finished with the burgers and we joined the ladies by the pool.

BPOV

I just couldn't believe how life had changed for me. I was happily married to the man of my dreams and we were starting our journey as a family. I couldn't wait to welcome our little bundle of joy into this world. It wouldn't be easy and far from safe but together with the help of our friends and family, they would be well provided and cared for. I couldn't believe how lucky I was to have Edward and this group that I trusted with my life. I still got to work a little here and there and that was fine with me. I even had a guest spot on Glee and as soon as the baby was born I would be appearing on Dancing with the Stars. That made me nervous. I was so glad that Emmett forgave me and we were back to normal. I couldn't wait til Rose told him their good news.

"Ladies and Gentleman, I don't want to take the attention from the happy couple but I have some news to make." Rose said as she tapped her spoon on the side of her glass to get everyone's attention.

I kept my eyes on Emmett as Rose started to speak.

"There will be more than one child born this year." She rushed out.

Emmett sat there for a minute and I laughed when I seen it hit him.. "Wait babe, you mean you're I mean we are pregnant?" he stuttered

"Yup. In fact Bella and I are due around the same time." She cried.

There was commotion as everyone was hugging and crying and laughing over the news. Rose and Emmett had been trying for as long as I could remember to have kids. I was shocked when I heard a throat clearing and Jasper spoke up.

"Well then I guess Alice and I should tell you we will be expecting too."

"Oh my gosh, everyone is having babies." Esme laughed.

~~~TFL~~~

9 months later-

"Push Bella. One last Push should be all it takes." Doctor Radner ordered as he glanced up at me. I pushed with all my might when all I really wanted to do was fall over from exhaustion. I had been pushing for what seemed like ages. I was admitted last night around nine. They broke my water around noon today and now here it was nearly midnight and I was finally going to get to see our daughter. Rynn Marie Cullen.

The sound of cries brought me out of my haze and I looked up as Edward carried our daughter over and laid her in my arms. She was so beautiful. She had Edward's hair and my eyes. His nose and crooked smile. She was absolutely adorable.

"Ok,Bella, you're all sewed up. I'm going to leave you in the nurse's capable hands and go attend to Rosalie ok?" Doctor Radner said as he stood from the foot of my bed. I nodded absentmindedly as I was so focused on my little family.

Emmett ran in an hour after the doctor left. "It's a boy. Fox Ryder Cullen. I'm a dad. I can't believe it." And with that he ran out again. I laughed and looked over at Edward and motioned for him to come over and sit with us on the bed. I just couldn't get enough of her.

"Hi little Rynn. Say hi to your daddy." I whispered as she looked around. Edward ran his finger down her cheek.

"She's beautiful. Just like her mama." He said as he kissed us both on the forehead.

EPOV

I couldn't get over the fact I had a daughter. She was beautiful. I kept glancing up into the rearview mirror as I drove Bella and Rynn home. Little did she know that mom had put together a little welcome home baby shower for Rose and Bella. Emmett , with Rose and Fox was behind us. They were staying with us for a little while so mom could stay and help both of them for a little while. I couldn't wait to watch the kids grow. Alice and Jasper would be welcoming their little bundle in about a month or so and they had opted not to find out the sex of the baby. But they had picked out the name Ryder. They said it would fit either a girl or a boy.

~~~TFL~~~

"Mom I can't find my skateboard" Rynn yelled down the stairs.

"Where did you leave it last?" I yelled up at her. Eight years old and can't keep up with anything but ask her what the square root of pi is and she can spout it off without even thinking about it.

"Hey, Bell, I think this belongs to Rynn. Fox had it." Rose said as she walked through the back door.

"What will we ever do with those two?" I laughed "Rynn. I found your skateboard." I yelled up the stairs. Soon I heard the pounding of feet running down the stairs. "Stop Running through the house" I yelled as she came to a halt in front of me.

"Fox had it." Rose laughed as she handed it over.

"Oh yeah, I let him borrow it. Duh! Thanks Aunt Rosy."She said as she took off out the door with her skateboard.

"Fox is already out there waiting for you." Rose hollered as the door closed. "I could kill Edward and Emmett for building that crap out there."

"I know but they want to spoil them. Alice should be here shortly with Ryder and Jackon." I said as I checked my watch. We was throwing the four a birthday party in the back yard.

"Why did we invite forty eight year olds over for?" Edward said as he came through the backdoor carrying a plate full of hamburgers and hot dogs. "Oh yeah, because we love our kids and have to celebrate birthdays and stuff." He joked as he kissed my forehead and sat the food in the oven to stay warm.

After what seemed like forever all the kids were gone including Rynn. Esme and Carlisle took the grandkids to their house for a sleep over. I had just put the last of the dishes away as Edward came in from taking out the last of the trash.

Later when we were cuddled up in bed, I turned to him and whispered "Love, I love you more than anything in the world. You and Rynn are the best things that ever happened to me you know that right?"

"What? What's wrong Bella?" He panicked.

"Nothing is matter love. I just wanted to tell you that I'm late." I smiled at him.

Later as I watched him sleep, I couldn't help but be thankful for all that had been bestowed upon me. I had the best husband ever, a wonderful daughter, a great huge family. Life just couldn't get any better. Or could it? Nah. I thought as I curled up next to my husband and drifted off into wonderland.

A/N: Thank you for taking this journey with me. I hope that you enjoy this last chapter to Bella and Edwards's life. They definitely deserved this happy ever after, after all the crap they went through. I hope you enjoyed the journey as much as I did. Thank you for reading and reviewing. I love you all. I'm off to enjoy a piece of Pie with Dean Winchester. ;) Peace love and Twilight.


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